(first posted 1/14/2014) As my father could have told you, I never was very good at listening to advice. I really appreciate all the great suggestions and tips in response to my quandary as to how to replace our poor old dying Forester. There’s 163 comments so far, and all of them good ones. So what do I do? Sit down and carefully mull them over with Stephanie? Not me.
Just this very afternoon of New Year’s Eve, I was heading to Lane Forest Products in Old Yeller’ to dump another load of of clippings from our annual winter garden pruning and clean-up, when I saw this divine 1972 LTD sitting at the curb, in triple green, no less! I could literally feel my heart skip a few beats…if it had been a ’71, I would have probably lost it, jumped the curb and hit a tree. Those of you who have been around for a while know my deep and abiding affection for these cars, especially the ’71. My love paean to it is here.
Its owner was just finishing up wiping it down after a wash, and the late-afternoon sun glistened and sparkled on its delicious contours and creases, dazzling me. I almost got killed crossing the street in a trance, oblivious to the traffic on busy W. 13th. As soon as I got to the other side, Jerry, its owner, approached me and said “I know who you are! The Curbside Classic guy!” Now that’s a first. Usually folks think I’m trying to steal their car when I start skulking around it with a camera. I knew this was going to be an auspicious encounter.
Jerry told me he’d snagged this cream puff from the St. Vincent dePaul lot just a week or so ago. Who would donate such a historic gem? It wasn’t running right, but that was soon fixed by re-arranging the plug wires on the proper spark plugs. Fords have a thing about liking the right firing order.
As Jerry opened the front door, I couldn’t help but tell him what this meant to me, to see the inside of one of these LTDs for the first time since I quit my job as a Ford lot boy and ran away from home in 1971. I had lots of seat time in 1971 LTDs back then, driving them ever-so gently around the various storage lots of Towson Ford to the distant body shop, and when I needed a set of wheels after hours. I was literally overcome with emotion at the sight of that distinctive brocade pattern, in green no less.
As I reached out and ran my fingers over that pattern, I was engulfed in a vivid memory from August of 1971. I had “borrowed” one of the many green LTDs from Towson Ford’s storage lot for the weekend, and three girls in my neighborhood all piled into the front seat next to me. Try doing that in your BMW 2002! We drove out to the Gunpowder River, up near the Pennsylvania line, and all went skinny dipping for the first time ever. And when the girl sitting right next to me raised her legs up a bit to get out of the Ford in her very short cut-offs, I could just barely make out the imprint of that brocade pattern on the back of her soft thigh. Sigh…my old eyes would never be able to see that kind of detail nowadays…
As I slid across that splendid sofa and positioned myself behind the wheel, I was flooded with other memories of that very long night. It may seem hard to imagine that any memories could leave a deeper impression than one’s first skinny dip with three high school girls while under the influence of hallucinogens, but the driving experience of one of these “Total Performance” Fords was undoubtedly the only one that could, especially in my heightened state.
The way that big LTD crisply zigged and zagged through all the endless tight curves on the little narrow country roads out to the Gunpowder, way up in Northern Baltimore County; this was simply the ultimate driving experience. Ford had learned from its successful racing efforts at the Indianapolis 500 and Le Mans, and applied them diligently to even its most pedestrian cars, especially the suspensions.
Every little input of that fine steering wheel was met with instant response, and the feedback through its hard and narrow rim was absolutely linear, as if the wheel was alive in my hands. I could feel every little goose-bump, pore, mole, and hair follicle on the sinewy curves of the sun-warmed pavement through my finger tips. And a gentle fondle of my bare big toe on the round raised rubber button on the center of that brake pedal was enough to elicit all the response one could want from the hyper-sensitive boosted brakes, and more.
Memory-sensory overload continued as I now rubbed my fingers over the skin of that distinctive textured vinyl on the dashboard. They just don’t make that stuff anymore, sadly. And this baby is only showing 2512 miles on the odometer; why it’s barely broken in, although the ones I drove back then got the special “Fast Break-in Procedure”. Not exactly according to Ford’s recommendations, but a secret procedure passed on orally from lot boy to lot boy.
I was so wanting to capture the magic sparkling the low sun was creating on the Ford’s dashboard vinyl, but my camera didn’t seem to be seeing quite what I was. I remember sitting for hours later that magical night in 1971, sitting behind the wheel and staring at the dash, parked at the little Quaker Meeting House, wide awake from the effects of what I had ingested earlier that evening, and dazzled by the infinite profundity of that texture, while my cohorts snoozed, spread out on the Ford’s big twin beds. The guys at Ford who must have spent weeks hand-tooling the dies for those vinyl molds were in my deep thoughts that long wakeful night, just sitting there behind the wheel, waiting for daylight.
I pondered: maybe it wasn’t too late for me to go back and finish high school, and get a job with Ford tooling the original patterns for their vinyl dashes and roofs, and eventually work my way up to hand-carving heraldic crests for their emblems. The Great Brougham Epoch was such a boon to Old World Craftsmanship, reviving skills that would otherwise have long died out.
Of course, that applied to all the fine woodworkers at Ford too, never mind the tailors and upholsterers. As I was sitting there now, it was becoming obvious to Jerry that I was having a rather serious episode, engulfed in a flood of powerful memories and emotions, tears welling up. He decided I might be under the influence of some off-gassing from the vinyl and all, seeing how virginal it still looked, and that it might be best if I got some fresh air. His lure was the engine. “You want to hear it run?”
What kind of question is that? I was almost afraid to ask what was under that long beaked hood, for fear it might just be the wee little 351 V8.
My fears were unfounded as Jerry raised the helicopter landing pad-sized hood, and the mighty Ford-blue M-Code 400 greeted my misted-over eyes. Don’t let its 172 hp hp rating fool you; that was just to con the insurance companies. This was nothing less than a mildly disguised racing engine, a de-stroked high-revving version of the side-oiler 427 as used in Ford’s Le Mans-winning Mark IVs. What endless black strips of rubber I used to leave on York Road, as the secondaries on its giant Holley double-pumper four barrel carb kicked in at around 5,000 rpm, for the final heady rush to its screaming 7,000 rpm redline. I was the luckiest seventeen year-old in America!
Jerry started it up, and it purred as smooth as a Nissan Leaf. By now my knees were already a bit shaky from this encounter with the dream car of my youth, when Jerry spoke the words I would never have dreamed to hear:
“You wanna’ buy it? I was just cleaning it up before putting it up for sale. My partner is pretty steamed at me for buying it, seeing as we’re saving up for a house down payment”. And we’ve got the Toyota wagon there in the driveway. Your timing was perfect, and it kinda seems like you really need this LTD a lot more than I do”.
“Yes!! We desperately need a new car, and I’ve been racking my mind about it. And this is just the perfect answer to all our needs. Yes!”
I was just imagining Stephanie’s excitement when she would see what I brought home for her. She sews and quilts, and is a lover of fine fabrics, and the brocade upholstery in green would undoubtedly bowl her over. The trunk would be big enough for her nursery starts, straw bales, and our son’s big dog. I did wonder if the the AM radio can be rigged up for her iPod.
One of our criteria was for a quiet car for long road trips, and the Ford is certainly unbeatable in that regard. Stephanie wants a car that will handle with aplomb the many high-speed curves of I-5 and the other highways as they wend their way through the mountains out here. And one that is fun to just drive. Bingo! I’m already imagining drifting it through the tight curves of gravel forest roads when we go hiking in the woods. Having spent my youth watching all those tv cop shows, I knew that there was a reason they obviously preferred big Fords and Mercuries to catch the bad guys in their sissy Porsches and Ferraris.
We were supposed to fly out to Iowa on New Year’s Day for a wedding on Saturday, but after Jerry and I shook hands, I decided to rush home, surprise Stephanie, throw our bags in the trunk, and drive out instead. With Ford’s legendary reliability in the seventies, I’m not even going to bother to have it checked out first. And I’m certainly not worried about the salt on the roads out there blemishing this indestructible baby. So I won’t be able to respond to your comments for a few days, but I know you all will approve of my choice. Sometimes you just have to act, and not over-think things. Especially when the answer is so utterly obvious.
Related CC follow-ups on this car:
“My” 1972 Ford LTD Is For Sale, Really
Sweet ride. Maybe I should consider another ’72 Buick Skylark like the one I had in high school instead of the V70. If I ever saw one and so happened to have a little extra scratch, then watch out 2nd honeymoon.
Great choice. But two questions. What was Stephanie’s real response? and Are you going to put clear plastic seat covers on it to protect it from the dog?
I want to see evidence of the three maidens skinny dipping.
That was really quite the write-up, er, story, Paul. I really enjoy seeing a car that is green inside and out, even if the shades of green don’t match. And, recounting your youthful memories of years ago that this car evoked makes this all the more interesting. The thing that got me wondering a bit is when you spoke of “with Ford’s legendary reliability in the seventies…” It was almost like somebody was under the influence of something. Just teasing, Paul. Very entertaining! Just a little hard to believe a car that old could be so very low mileage. Must have been stored, undriven, for very many years.
A true survivor. Fords always handle well.
Some quirks might include a back pressure activated EGR valve and myriad temperature sensors limiting vacuum advance. Oh and a power valve that “may” leak and start a fire.
The M’s are very durable engines in and of themselves.
My grandmother’s last car was one of these, although hers was a four door sedan without the vinyl roof. I drove it extensively when I was home on leave from the Air Force and the one thing I remember most was the poor gas mileage, around 10 MPG in everyday, around town driving; quite a noticeable difference from the 30+ MPG I was getting from my VW Rabbit. By the time I mustered out of the service and returned home my grandmother had pretty much given up on driving, but kept the car as it was easier for her to get in and out of than the compacts that I and my siblings mostly owned. This was before I got married so I would go by her house a couple of times a week to check on her, mow the grass, do minor repairs, etc. I would take the old Ford out and drive it around, just to keep all the parts working. I don’t know about 7000 RPM but I would wind the 400 up pretty good. After my grandmother died my father sold the Ford to a co-worker who bought it to tow his boat.
There is absolutely no reason one has to drive a perfectly boring car.
Sometimes you just have to lower your standards and embrace the suck.
Man, will you have stories to tell!
I know it’s a well written satire, but . . . I am kinda sucked in. This car does appear to really exist on your home turf . . . and . . . . did you REALLY buy this car? I would’ve snapped it up, but in 2014 Honolulu, curbsides (!) are about the only place you could park this car, although (ironically), many locals love full size, x or crew cab pickups.
I have a set of yellow 1969-75 issue Hawaii tags that would go perfect on this car. It could be Danno or Chin Ho’s chase car to McGarrett’s Park Lane Mercury . . . . whip it around corners in Kakaako . . . . people old enough would think they were time-warped to ’72 . . . .
Seriously, if you DID get this, aside from all the fluid and brake/suspension revamps/checks for an old car with super low miles, love and enjoy it. Road trip machine . . . . that interior looks brand new. Aside from some carpet dirt/discolorization, it looks like new.
Enjoy the hell out of it, Paul! Great satire, as usual! While I know the commentary was the stuff April 1st is made of, I hope you did buy that car and reclaim a slice of your youth. And that goat vomit green….LOVE IT.
I had a 400 in a 78 ltd landau coupe and it lasted until I got rid of it with over 200000 miles. And once the cam was advanced 8 degrees and the emmissions removed and I also added dual exhausts and put 3 55 gears in it. It had all kinds if power and was good on gas. Most efficient car I ever had. 18 mpg town and 27 hwy on cruise. Best car I ever had. And reliable. You rock Paul.
Well done. I loved the skinny dipping story–especially the detail about the brocade imprint on her leg–and I LOVE that green! Well, at least one of them (the paint)!
Congratulations – beautiful car – color perfectly captures the 70s……..
And I can’t believe all the folks here who think you are engaging in satire when you state what a high tech, high horsepower, power mill the 400 is – mine in my 78 Lincoln Town Coupe is the epitome of a big block bruiser, with a “hair trigger” throttle that pours out instant power all the way up to 7000 rpm! I’m glad I found at least one other person who appreciates what a performance legend this motor is………
I missed a few CC posts over the last week and I’m just catching up now – nearly pissed myself reading this!!!!
I just saw it for sale on craigslist.
It has an AM radio!
Now I know why they called them limited!
So… will you show us the resulting demo derby pics?
In July 1972 I purchased a brand new Ford Galaxie500 from a dealer in Raleigh. NC. The sticker price was $5300 and as the 73 models were being released soon they let me have it for $4100. I drove it to Newport News and from there had it shipped to Cape Town, South Africa. From there I drove it to Bulawayo, Rhodesia where I lived. Before leaving the Dealership I asked for a favor. Can you give me a pro forma invoice for $3000 ( saving me import duty etc which they kindly did). The 4 door hardtop cream with a blue vinyl roof was the only one of its kind and I had 8 great years of use before selling it.
Dear Paul,
I lived in the U.S. as a student in Blacksburg, VA in 1988-1990 and had exactly the same car: 72 Ford LTD, same colour, same radio, same everything. Fa-bu-lous. Best car I ever owned and will ever own. I would give my right arm to have it back.
I hope you are still enjoying yours.
Kind regards,
Hugues
Looks like those cars I saw on Police Story. In the early episodes. Also on Police Woman, The FBI, The Streets of San Francisco
I’m not sure about Police Woman, but The F.B.I. and The Streets of San Francisco were both Quinn Martin Productions, and the producer of both of those TV shows had a thing for Fords.
Just saw a few minutes of a “P/W”, episode this morn. Looked to be a “75-6ish”, one.
At first I thought this was a Mercury! Like the car! Looks great!
I’m currently building an early ‘72 400 for the LTD. I purchased it last year with 78,000 miles. 2 door, paint code 5J (medium ginger bronze metallic poly) with a white vinyl top in excellent shape. Original down to the trunk spare. When I first got it and broke the seized up carb linkage loose and really drove it I was very surprised by the power. Now I have to make it faster! From my memory of driving cars during the 80’s in high school, this car is a beast compared to the dog camaros and trans ams of the time. Wife agrees.
I spent more than a few hours in the Summer of 1972 crammed in a ‘72 Ford , green on green (but no vinyl top) like this one. A few girls, a few boys … but no swimming holes or skinny dipping, as the oldest occupant was our driver training teacher. Somehow the excitement of being behind the wheel has erased any memories of the Ford’s fine handling and tire-burning power. In fact, my recollection is that the ‘73 Coronet, which replaced the Ford for the last few sessions of the course, was a much better car. But what does a barely-16 year old know? Thanks for setting the record straight, Paul. And happy April 1st to the CC world!
You’ve reminded me of my 71 Ford Custom 4 door with 302 V8, automatic and AM radio.
Wonderful highway car, wonderful car for the drive-in. I didn’t want to drive my Vega GT into the ground so the used Custom was ideal for country driving and the two hour trip to the big city on the occasional weekend.
Friend of the family had a loaded 72 Country Squire. What a car that was! The big Fords were driven and have almost disappeared. I’d be elated to come across a 71-72 Big Ford of any model now. Slim chance that will happen. Lucky you Paul!
“and when I needed a set of wheels after hours.” ! .
Ah, _HA_ ! it was _you_ =8-) .
-Nate
LOL – From the Xbox to a Barge. 😆
Happy April Fools Day Paul
Was never a fan of the extruded beltline creases, above the wheel arches. A faddish styling element, that dated the design, quite quickly. In fact, it could be argued, the profile of the previous generation LTD appears cleaner.
The colour scheme is too much! In 1972, I would have been repulsed. lol
Hopefully you actually bought this huge green highway beast and this is not just some cruel April fools joke… Love the car, amazing condition. A fantastic find.. Enjoy it in good health. Don’t stain the brocade 😄
Oh man, basically my Grandpa’s car, right down to the colour and the fabric on the seats….
In the fall of 1981, I was living in Phoenix and in desperate need of an air conditioned car for my new family. I had a $700 budget and narrowed the field down to a ‘66 Grand Prix and a 72 LTD 2door. Both had ice-cold a/c, unlike my GT750 Suzuki or my ‘74 Datsun 620 pickup. I went with the GP because it was $400 and gave me $300 worth of breathing room, while the LTD would have tapped me out. Never regretted the decision, just wish I could have afforded both.
Mid “60’s, Pontiacs” are awesome! The one you got in “AZ” was in good shape?
We never had any rides that nice.
We’re in the marker for a runabout type car for dump runs, supermarket visits, use on crappy roads, you get the picture. Having seen a couple of nice older cars that would fit the bill ( an early Mondeo, a tatty but solid Sierra estate) politics dictate we’ll probably end up with a Micra or a Note. When we do get said car I won’t be looking like Paul in the headline photo.
Paul!
Don’t leave us hanging! What happened since 2014? Your partner’s response? Your trip to Iowa? Do you still have it or did you run it to the ground driving it on salted roads? Updated pics?
Hiding to hear the rest of the story!
Dan
Stephanie hated it. I totally misread her. But it was too late so off we headed off to Iowa. She almost didn’t come, and it would have been better if she hadn’t. We had numerous issues and breakdowns with the car and finally the engine blew up somewhere west of Laramie. We had to abandon it and hitchhike, which did not endear Stephanie. When we got to Cheyenne, she hopped on a bus back to Oregon, and that was the end of our 36 year-long marriage.
On the way back west I hired a tow truck in Cheyenne and rode with him to retrieve it, but it had been totally stripped of all of its like-new parts and trim. If you drive on I-80 about 66 miles west of Cheyenne, you can still see the hulk of it sitting in the sagebrush off the side of the road.
Buying this LTD was the worst decision I ever made; it’s ruined my life. I should have listened to everyone and not been such an idiot. I still really miss Stephanie. And now I really hate these LTDs.
My parents had this exact car, but a ’73. Same color, same green brocade interior, same 400M.
29 days after I got my first driver’s license, the LTD gave it’s all when a Ford van ran a stop sign in front of me. Totaled on the spot.
And the stories I have from York Rd. going to the Maryland Line Inn for beer in my ’63 Chevy II Nova…
In 2014 I wouldn’t have thought of an influence from Mr Adam but now this is a complement to an episode of rare classic cars and automotive history and his favorite cars.
Thought of it, for some reason, this morn, School friend of mine; his parents had a “70”, darker green, “Galaxie”. The inside, now I recall, was quite like the inside a this “LTD”.
His dad worked for (hundreds of years there) the local “Ford” dealer.
Always had used “Fords, as the family car.
They got the “70” around about “74-5”.
Congratulations!
You own a car where you can look down through the engine compartment and actually see the ground.