I thought I’d seen it all, at least as far as AA-body Mopars go. I mean, there are six of them in my COAL series; I’ve written about American and Mexican TV ads for them twice; I’ve geeked out about carbureted and multipoint-injected Mexican Spirits, and waxed photographic about an old-timer Acclaim in the mountains. I’m disturbingly conversant in the minutiæ of the European-market Chrysler Saratoga; I’m aware of the police Spirits of Mexico and Argentina; and of the leaded-fuel-injected Spirits, Acclaims, and LeBarons in the Middle East; and the top de luxe AA-body New Yorkers of Mexico, with the V6, padded landau half-roof, and air-level suspension. I’ve chased rumours of locally-built ones in Taiwan or China (fruitlessly; that was probably the Hongqi CA750F as spewed from the output pipe of a garburator).
But an armoured (AArmoured?) one…?! Squack! Here’s Here’s the listing on MercadoLibre (more or less eBay in Latin America), and here’s a screen grab:
An old friend sent me this shortly ago in retribution for my having sent him an American ad for a low-miles Spirit R/T I knew would make his teeth itch. At first I completely missed the point of the LeBaron—Ooh, yeah, be seen in this and everyone’s gonna know they better not cross you because you will mess them up. No, it’s just the opposite: this is a car that gets lost in a crowd of one. It’s an invisibility cloak—and a bulletproof one, at that. Which, come to think of it, might still mean don’t cross you because you’ll mess them up.
First off, the listing’s text, minus the advertiser’s all-caps shouting:
Chrysler LeBaron 1995 blindado nivel 3 plus. Crystales de 27mm sin burbujas ni delaminados, placa de acero balistico de 7mm, totalmente reforzado. Motor 4 cil turbo, todo functiona perfectamente—motor, caja, clima, suspension, etc etc etc. En verdad impecable, factura original. Tenencias en orden, excelente unidad, muy buena proteccion a muy buen precio. Precio unico, solo venta de contado efectivo. Vehiculo utilitario y con bajo perfil, vealo sin compromiso. Escriba, llame, o por whatsapp. 135,000 km, $150,000
All of which is to say:
1995 Chrysler LeBaron armoured to level 3-plus. 27mm (a little over 1″ thick) glass—no bubbles or delamination. 7mm (a little over ¼”) ballistic steel plating—totally reinforced. 4-cylinder turbo engine. Everything works perfectly—engine, transmission, air conditioning, suspension, etc etc etc. Truly impeccable [with] factory invoice. Papers in order, excellent unit; very good protection at a very low price. One price, cash only. Utility vehicle with a low profile; see it without obligation. Write, call, or WhatsApp. 135,000 km (about 84k miles); 150,000 Pesos (about USD $7,400 as of today).
It’s for sale in Xalapa—also spelled Jalapa—where the English word “jalopy” comes from, and the capital of the Mexican East Coast state of Veracruz. Alright, then; let’s see it without obligation!
Thick bulletproof door glass moots the question of whether the power windows work. Note the dotty pattern around the inner perimeter—that’s some nice attention to detail adjacent to the somewhat hackish-looking glass/metal junction at the outer perimeter.
I figured the armour-up was what makes the windshield look odd, but it took some closer scrutiny to figure out how; it’s a combination of its rubber seals bulging unusually, and the double reflections of every branch in the tree. The rubber seals are missing from around the headlamps, at least one of which is wet inside; neither fault is surprising. Up north here, we’d call this an ’89-’93 Dodge Spirit ES front bumper fascia with ’91-’93 frog lamps. The power-operated antenna wasn’t offered up here, and neither were the body-coloured sideview mirrors.
The armoured backglass, too, looks a little unusual; its surface curvature isn’t standard and there’s another bulgy rubber seal. That’s a ’91-’92 Dodge Spirit R/T trunklid spoiler, and a rear bumper fascia never used up north, with a notch for the straight tailspout also never used up north…
…and lookin’ kinda heat-baked and warped by the hot Mexican sun. We also see here (barely, through the dark tint) the licence plate-lookalike sticker in the backglass, a hedge against licence plate theft I’ve seen on other Mexican-registered cars.
Front and rear passengers get bulletproof glass of their very own.
The seats are done up in a combination of velour and FCL (fine Corinthian leather) not offered up north. Digital instrument cluster with printwood faceplate; courtesy lights in the doors, power driver’s seat. This isn’t one of the safer AA-bodies to crash in; the knee bolster’s been removed from under the steering column for some reason, and—like its north-of-the-border counterparts—it’s got the self-unbuckling seatbelts:
No airbag, either; that’s a bag-delete steering wheel cover; here’s a closer view:
It does have power locks, though, and that’s gotta count for something.
I think the torn trunk carpet we see here might be revealing some of that 7mm ballistic steel plating the ad mentions.
Behold the Mexico-only Chrysler 2.5 Turbo-II engine: 168 horsepower, up 18 from the US/Canada Turbo-I version with no intercooler or intake charge temperature sensor. I’m not sure whether the Turbo II has balance shafts; they were deleted from some of the Mexican MPFI nonturbo 2.5s—and boy, would this long-stroke Four be a buzzy, harsh engine without them. I sleep well knowing the engine control module is № 4686820. The transaxle is a Torqueflite 3-speed. I don’t know how much scoot it would be reasonable to expect of this powertrain loaded down with all that extra glass and steel…
…and these chrome wheel arch mouldings.
Still, I’ve got questions. Those look like 14-inch wheels. Does “Level 3” armour include run-flat tires? If not, these 195/70R14s would seem to present fat targets. What about the fuel tank, is it armoured as well? Just how extensive is that 7mm ballistic steel plating? And how many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll centre of a Tootsie Pop? The world may never know…!
Forget the tires, you can still drive on the bare rims. Unless of course, the attackers hit the completely exposed radiator, then that Turbo-4 would take about 30 seconds to get to Chernobyl temps (as a COAL Daytona Turbo-Z owner, trust me on this) and then you are done for.
This car might make a handy taxi on the runs between the Mexican Riviera resorts and Cancun Airport, considering how the drug gangs have taken over that area.
Yeah, the radiator seems like another soft target, doesn’t it. I’m not sure how that could be hardened without spoiling cooling and/or the car’s stealth.
To be real safe yoy could buy an ex cash in transit armoured truck and throw some seats in the back..
I imagine some sort of angled slatted mesh to prevent a bullet from having a straight path to the radiator. Upgraded fan to help pull air through the maze as well. I’m sure they thought of something as it seems such an obvious vulnerability.
The hood-up engine bay photo shows no mesh or other protective element.
Sounds like drug cartels have taken over the country .i have a friend who lived 120 kms north of Mexico City . We agreed to meet up in Cancun because it was safer……… One of his close friends was driven to school by the family driver/ armed body guard in a normal Chrysler Town & Country.. So sad..
Air bag was undoubtedly removed intentionally so that the driver would not be disabled by its blowing up due to a maliciously-directed front impact. The car’s intended function rules.
In that climate, hopefully the air conditioning never fails.
That, or it wasn’t there in the first place.
I think the old way of dealing with tires was either a tire with a very thick sidewall with elements added to prevent piercing (kevlar belts etc) Or the more common way was to install a urethane or solid rubber inner band on the rim that would support the tire at about mid point o 3/4 of the sidewall. Like these
Interesting in general. In high crime area with kidnapping etc, this seems like a decent solution. Either you travel with a full regiment of guards to protect your armored S class or run one of these and stay as invisible as possible but with a back up plan if that fails.
No amber turn signal indicators in the taillamps. Pass. 😉
There are amber bulbs in the lower clear area of the rear lights… shared with the reverse lights with clear bulbs.
No, there aren’t. There is one bulb—and only one, a clear one providing the reversing light function—in the lower section of the taillamp. What looks like a second, smaller, outboard compartment is just a space filler. The rear turn signal function is provided by flashing the brake light.
Every few weeks I read a story about some hapless person driving through a high-crime area of a large city (Baltimore, Chicago, Indianapolis, St. Louis – pick one or supply your own) when an occupant gets hit by a stray bullet that pierces the car. Sad to say, but this would be just the ticket for someone who is stuck in an area like that.
Add New Orleans to the list of those shot at and/or killed while in a car. The action has moved to the interstates (I-10 or I-610) with car jacking, ambush, shooting gallery, road rage, etc. Not a happy place.
So far I think I’ve done a very good job of keeping quiet about American tongues clucking over gun violence in another country.
(Oops, damn.)
And far more often than once every few weeks I read about some kid or toddler in a not so bad neighborhood dying due to a gun that was found laying around the house or in a car by another kid or toddler.
But maybe we should just issue every American high schooler one of these cars and teach school at the Drive-In instead.
You’re advocating for a solution that’s far from the more obvious one, counsellor…
What a interesting vehicle – thanks for posting this. I suppose there is a robust aftermarket in Mexico for secure vehicles. I’m assuming that the armor plating is more of a deterrent for kidnappings or small arms ambushes, so maybe the theory is that even without run-flat tires or an armored gas tank, that the amount of security provided by this type of car would help thwart some common types of attacks. I’ll guess the original owner was a well-connected businessperson… the license plate of 77-77 was likely ordered with connections (though goes against the grain of having an invisibility cloak).
And I never knew the origin of the term jalopy. Learned something new today.
I donno about the licence plate; 77-77 could easily have just been next in sequence after 77-76.
Beyond the question of why do this on a small platform car like this, I beg to ask about those front marker lights at the bottom. One set in the bumper, one set below the bumper. It gives the car a look as if one car was mounted almost all the way on top of the body of another same car, and it didn’t quite make it all the way.
There must be several weak spots to the plating. The rad as was mentioned above, although maybe this car is like the Dart in The Duel, the movie, where it just keeps running despite the ongoing threat of overheating. The bottom of the car, the tires. Or the smallish overall exterior dimensions that allow a suitably equipped large passing truck to capture the whole thing on the fly!
The only marker lights here are the triangular-shaped side marker light/reflectors outboard of the headlamps. The lamps set in the bumper are the parking and turn signal lights. The ones below the bumper—as noted in the text—are frog lamps; useless, purely cosmetic ones. All of this is identical to how it was done on the Spirit ES and R/T and the Acclaim LX cars in the US and Canada, and the European Saratoga which, like the ’89-’90 domestic-market cars, got much better—though still useless—frog lamps.
(the Duel car was a ’70 Valiant)
The fact that not the first, not the second, but the third generation seatbelt can so easily unbuckle itself speaks to Chryslers priorities.
It certainly points up severe shortsightedness and gross negligence. I don’t know for sure, but I think I’m on sturdy ground guessing they switched to the gen-3 belt because fractionally cheaper. The European-spec belts very obviously had quite a lot more money in them.
From what I understand, just as long as the target car can drive away from the ambush and call for backup is the major point. Once the bandits realize the ambush failed, they will run for cover to avoid witnesses, CCTV, police, etc.
This brings to mind the ambush on Charles de Gaulle in the movie “Day of the Jackal”. The idea is not to engage in a gun battle, but to put as much distance between you and the attachers.
I wonder if the airbag delete was a deliberate decision to avoid getting a face full of airbag while ramming or being rammed in a sticky situation.
I’ve also seen an A3 Jetta armored by Hess & Eisenhart as a low profile option for SOuth America.
That would stand to reason. I can’t figure out the knee bolster delete, though. Maybe that part’s just missing.