Sir, do you know why I pulled you over today?
\
Cop
No officer, what seems to be the problem?
\
Marquis driver
Sir, I stopped you for several violations of inadequate Broughaminess. You are driving a 1977 Mercury Marquis without the proper vinyl roof, whitewall tires, or opera lamps. You don’t even have two-tone paint or pinstriping.
\
Cop
I’m sorry sir, I’ll get that fixed as soon as possible.
\
Marquis driver
Ok, I’ll let you off with a warning this time. But if I catch you around town again, this Marquis better have a loose pillow look velor interior in burgundy.
\
cop
I work in a very high-end neighborhood. My 1995 Explorer should blend in with all the ‘workers’ cars but it gets the extra eyeball from the police, while my 1977 Chevelle which stands out like a beacon in the night in that neighborhood doesn’t even rate a second glance from them.
I guess the figure that since its the only one of its kind, the know that I’m not gonna be stupid and get into trouble with it, where the Explorer is still as anonymous of an SUV as it always has been that they might have a reason to pull it over.
I live in Ontario and this brings back bad memories. When I bought my Parisienne i drove it with a paper 10 day permit while preparing to do the safety check on it. Old cars pre 90’s are the only vehicles eligible to use a paper temporary in the front window. everything else has plates with a t sticker. so i stuck out like a sore thumb and younger cops had no idea about the paper permit. i was pulled over 5 times in 10 days! (only because of the permit). the last time i drove past a parked cop, so i immediately pulled over and was just coming to a stop as he lit me up. he thought that was funny, asked me about the car and check my papers and let me go. that week was the most OPP exposure i’d had in my whole life.
You should be able to get the plate with the “T” sticker on older cars too. My friend got one several years ago when they first came out when they bought a 1979 Olds Delta 88 coupe. I don’t know if you remember when the MTO was on strike about 10 or 12 years ago. There were tons of cars with 10 day trip permits on, because they weren’t issuing new plates. I bought a car during that time period and had the trip permit for about 1 month before I could get plates. I even got a couple of free trips on the 407 out of it.
Huh… I would certainly would’ve preferred plates with a T sticker, I really hate being a heatscore lmao.
The folks at my local “service” Ontario(MTO) aren’t always super knowledgeable , maybe they didn’t know how to do it the way you mentioned.
No. You are driving an un-oil-garded car in the frost season after the salt trucks have been out. By the powers invested in me, I am hereby securing your vehicle for its own protection. You say you just got it because it looks ‘cool’? Well, sir, there is more to preservation of Canada’s unique automotive heritage than that. We have a legal duty to preserve our up-market branded yet absurdly poorly equipped cars every bit as much as playing domestic content upon the AM radio which your car was not equipped with.
You will be able to retrieve your vehicle upon completion of either a classic vehicle maintenance and appreciation course.
By the way- I noticed your front bumper is a bit askew. You don’t know anything about the coal train derailment a couple of miles back by any chance…..
Cop: Do you know how fast you were going?
Old lady: Why yes, 80 MPH just like the sign said.
Cop: No ma’am, 80 is the highway number, not the speed limit. I’m going to let you off with a warning this time, but pay more attention in the future.
Old lady: Thank you officer. You’re very kind.
Cop: By the way, why does everyone else in your car look like they just saw a ghost?
Old lady: Oh that. We just got off highway 105.
(I know this is a Canadian photo, but the numbers work better in MPH.)
I thought of a Canadian version, but it’s not as funny.
Cop: Do you know how fast you were going?
Young guy: Yeah, 80 km/h just like the sign said. I think the speedo must be off because I was flying by everybody and they usually speed at 100 on this highway.
Cop: Did you just get this car, kid?
Young guy: Yeah, it was my grandfather’s car.
Cop: The speedometer is in MILES per hour! This car is from before Canada adopted the metric system. You were going 130 km/h.
Young guy: Uh oh. I didn’t know. Can I get off with a warning?
Cop: Nice try, that’s 50 over the limit, which means an automatic license suspension and impounding your car.
Something very like this actually happened to a friend of mine, fairly new to Australia back in the eighties. He bought a pre-metric Valiant, and didn’t realise the speedo hadn’t been converted. He used to drive at 100 (that’s 160km/h) on the highway, and wonder why he was passing everything in sight. Just as well he was never able to get it up to 60 (100km/h) in town traffic!
A friend of mine re-geared the speedo in his 1970s Mini to make it easier to convert speeds, so that 50 on the mph-originally speedo was actually 100km/h. He was a fairly wild driver (comment from one passenger after a ride “we nearly slid into a house”) and I’m not sure he always kept the 2x conversion in mind!
You down with O.P.P? (Yeah you know me!)
You down with O.P.P? (Yeah you know me!)
You down with O.P.P? (Yeah you know me!)
Who’s down with O.P.P? (Every last Marquis!)
I can’t believe no one has recognized me behind the wheel. You all know my fatal attraction to the Marquis, and after the ’71 was snapped up by the ACD museum, I found myself an even bigger one. And no vinyl roof! This one’s a keeper.
But I keep forgetting about those damn km/h Canadian speed limits! The Marquis felt great at 110! A magic carpet ride.
I think that’s a “Highway Safety Division” cruiser, at least that’s what it looks like on the 1/4 panel. If that’s the case, probably no breaks for this guy. I once got stopped by one near Toronto, and he gave me a hard time because my ownership said my truck was gray. He said it should say gray and blue (since it was two-tone). After I explained to him that the MTO only lets me put one colour on the ownership, and since there is more gray than blue, that’s why it says gray. He decided to let me go, thankfully saving me a day in court.
Ok, here’s what I think happened. This was taken on Canadian Thanksgiving weekend on Ontario Hwy 6. It had been all over the radio for days that the OPP were conducting a safety blitz on the holiday weekend, and Hwy 6 is a notoriously dangerous and heavily enforced stretch of road.
We were on our way to the inlaws, Mrs DougD took the photo as I was driving. I didn’t get a good look but I don’t think the Mercury had a licence plate on the back. Can’t imagine why someone would take such a chance, the odds were very high that you would encounter a cop.
What strikes me as odd is that the Mercury and the Crown Vic look the same size in the photo. The Crown Vic actually looks a bit bigger. Maybe that’s an illusion, and it is closer to the camera?
I even used a photo editor to compare the image sizes.
The CV is clearly closer to the camera. Not how the pavement slopes up some, making the further back Marquis also higher up. Even a fairly small difference in distance can make a noticeable difference.
Love that pic! That Marquis looks to be the rare base model. And it has fender skirts too! Probably a special order back in the day. I’ll bet any money that car is weirdly equipped inside, too. I’m thinking A/C, AM radio, cruise control, a clock, full vinyl bench seat, and maybe a rear defroster. No power windows or locks. (Well maybe only power locks as it is a massive sedan!)
It totally reminds me of my childhood as I had a next-door neighbor that always bought stripped full-sized base model Mercury Marquis sedans. Every 3 years he would order a new one and trade in the old one. He had a white 1971 base Marquis, a red 1974, another white 1977, then a new panther – a goldish colored 1980 base Marquis sedan. He actually kept the 1980 until 1985 and got – what? Lo and behold – a loaded to the hilt Grand Marquis?? Can this be the same neighbor? As a matter of fact, he had gone to order another car and the salesperson (the same guy who sold him the last four Marquis) told him of a cancelled order on a burgundy Grand Marquis and that it was a good deal so he went for it. When I asked him about the car, he said he felt like he was in the lap of luxury! He often referred to his 1985 as a mini Lincoln! His wife loved that car, too. He kept that car for 7 years and replaced it in 1992 with a new body style silver Grand Marquis which he drove until he died in 1997, and which his wife kept driving until she passed in 2002.
To clarify, it wasn’t his own car, which was a 1974 Pontiac GrandVille 2door, that car was left at the Red Fox restaurant in the Detroit suburbs. At around 2 in the afternoon he was seen getting into a burgundy Grand Marquis.
His Pontiac was still there in the evening after Hoffa had gone missing, it was the only thing left to even prove that he was there
C’mon Crab ;
I know you have a good one in you .
-Nate
Maybe the driver was imagining he was Steve McGarrett on his way to a case?! 🙂
“You can’t arrest me, I’m a Marquis and I have diplomatic immunity!”
LOL!
Almost perfect! Only possible improvement would be if the police car was in fact a Diplomat.
“Just the facts maam”
Sir, do you know why I pulled you over today?
\
Cop
No officer, what seems to be the problem?
\
Marquis driver
Sir, I stopped you for several violations of inadequate Broughaminess. You are driving a 1977 Mercury Marquis without the proper vinyl roof, whitewall tires, or opera lamps. You don’t even have two-tone paint or pinstriping.
\
Cop
I’m sorry sir, I’ll get that fixed as soon as possible.
\
Marquis driver
Ok, I’ll let you off with a warning this time. But if I catch you around town again, this Marquis better have a loose pillow look velor interior in burgundy.
\
cop
At least it has fender skirts. It’d be practically naked without them.
Sir, the fender skirts are the only reason I’m letting you off with a warning today.
Burgundy!?!
Please.
With that exterior color, the crushed velour just HAS to be baby blue!
I was probably thinking of Ron Burgundy, that 70s icon.
Yep, with an old classic you don’t blend in with the automotive scenery anymore so you’ve got to be on your best behavior.
I work in a very high-end neighborhood. My 1995 Explorer should blend in with all the ‘workers’ cars but it gets the extra eyeball from the police, while my 1977 Chevelle which stands out like a beacon in the night in that neighborhood doesn’t even rate a second glance from them.
I guess the figure that since its the only one of its kind, the know that I’m not gonna be stupid and get into trouble with it, where the Explorer is still as anonymous of an SUV as it always has been that they might have a reason to pull it over.
Hey buddy, cool car! My Dad had one of these when I was a little kid. Mind if I take a look under the hood?
Meanwhile across the street…..
“Wo Fat was speeding. Well, just let him get the ticket and we’ll keep following him to the shipyard.”
I live in Ontario and this brings back bad memories. When I bought my Parisienne i drove it with a paper 10 day permit while preparing to do the safety check on it. Old cars pre 90’s are the only vehicles eligible to use a paper temporary in the front window. everything else has plates with a t sticker. so i stuck out like a sore thumb and younger cops had no idea about the paper permit. i was pulled over 5 times in 10 days! (only because of the permit). the last time i drove past a parked cop, so i immediately pulled over and was just coming to a stop as he lit me up. he thought that was funny, asked me about the car and check my papers and let me go. that week was the most OPP exposure i’d had in my whole life.
You should be able to get the plate with the “T” sticker on older cars too. My friend got one several years ago when they first came out when they bought a 1979 Olds Delta 88 coupe. I don’t know if you remember when the MTO was on strike about 10 or 12 years ago. There were tons of cars with 10 day trip permits on, because they weren’t issuing new plates. I bought a car during that time period and had the trip permit for about 1 month before I could get plates. I even got a couple of free trips on the 407 out of it.
Huh… I would certainly would’ve preferred plates with a T sticker, I really hate being a heatscore lmao.
The folks at my local “service” Ontario(MTO) aren’t always super knowledgeable , maybe they didn’t know how to do it the way you mentioned.
Sir, do you know why I pulled you over today?
Wafting in my lane?
No. You are driving an un-oil-garded car in the frost season after the salt trucks have been out. By the powers invested in me, I am hereby securing your vehicle for its own protection. You say you just got it because it looks ‘cool’? Well, sir, there is more to preservation of Canada’s unique automotive heritage than that. We have a legal duty to preserve our up-market branded yet absurdly poorly equipped cars every bit as much as playing domestic content upon the AM radio which your car was not equipped with.
You will be able to retrieve your vehicle upon completion of either a classic vehicle maintenance and appreciation course.
By the way- I noticed your front bumper is a bit askew. You don’t know anything about the coal train derailment a couple of miles back by any chance…..
I would be completely in favor of this type of policy.
Cop: Do you know how fast you were going?
Old lady: Why yes, 80 MPH just like the sign said.
Cop: No ma’am, 80 is the highway number, not the speed limit. I’m going to let you off with a warning this time, but pay more attention in the future.
Old lady: Thank you officer. You’re very kind.
Cop: By the way, why does everyone else in your car look like they just saw a ghost?
Old lady: Oh that. We just got off highway 105.
(I know this is a Canadian photo, but the numbers work better in MPH.)
I thought of a Canadian version, but it’s not as funny.
Cop: Do you know how fast you were going?
Young guy: Yeah, 80 km/h just like the sign said. I think the speedo must be off because I was flying by everybody and they usually speed at 100 on this highway.
Cop: Did you just get this car, kid?
Young guy: Yeah, it was my grandfather’s car.
Cop: The speedometer is in MILES per hour! This car is from before Canada adopted the metric system. You were going 130 km/h.
Young guy: Uh oh. I didn’t know. Can I get off with a warning?
Cop: Nice try, that’s 50 over the limit, which means an automatic license suspension and impounding your car.
Something very like this actually happened to a friend of mine, fairly new to Australia back in the eighties. He bought a pre-metric Valiant, and didn’t realise the speedo hadn’t been converted. He used to drive at 100 (that’s 160km/h) on the highway, and wonder why he was passing everything in sight. Just as well he was never able to get it up to 60 (100km/h) in town traffic!
A friend of mine re-geared the speedo in his 1970s Mini to make it easier to convert speeds, so that 50 on the mph-originally speedo was actually 100km/h. He was a fairly wild driver (comment from one passenger after a ride “we nearly slid into a house”) and I’m not sure he always kept the 2x conversion in mind!
That photo can’t be very old. I know where that gas station is, and it was an Esso until not too long ago.
You down with O.P.P? (Yeah you know me!)
You down with O.P.P? (Yeah you know me!)
You down with O.P.P? (Yeah you know me!)
Who’s down with O.P.P? (Every last Marquis!)
Having clicked the ‘next’ link (no picture), I was waiting to see a photo of PN shooting a CC from one of our other Eugene correspondents.
I can’t believe no one has recognized me behind the wheel. You all know my fatal attraction to the Marquis, and after the ’71 was snapped up by the ACD museum, I found myself an even bigger one. And no vinyl roof! This one’s a keeper.
But I keep forgetting about those damn km/h Canadian speed limits! The Marquis felt great at 110! A magic carpet ride.
You really get around Paul, a mere 23 hours of driving at 110
Well, that was only after crossing into Canada, because the signs said so. As you all know, I would never willingly exceed the speed limit.
I think that’s a “Highway Safety Division” cruiser, at least that’s what it looks like on the 1/4 panel. If that’s the case, probably no breaks for this guy. I once got stopped by one near Toronto, and he gave me a hard time because my ownership said my truck was gray. He said it should say gray and blue (since it was two-tone). After I explained to him that the MTO only lets me put one colour on the ownership, and since there is more gray than blue, that’s why it says gray. He decided to let me go, thankfully saving me a day in court.
Ricky! Put that under the seat!
Ok, here’s what I think happened. This was taken on Canadian Thanksgiving weekend on Ontario Hwy 6. It had been all over the radio for days that the OPP were conducting a safety blitz on the holiday weekend, and Hwy 6 is a notoriously dangerous and heavily enforced stretch of road.
We were on our way to the inlaws, Mrs DougD took the photo as I was driving. I didn’t get a good look but I don’t think the Mercury had a licence plate on the back. Can’t imagine why someone would take such a chance, the odds were very high that you would encounter a cop.
What strikes me as odd is that the Mercury and the Crown Vic look the same size in the photo. The Crown Vic actually looks a bit bigger. Maybe that’s an illusion, and it is closer to the camera?
I even used a photo editor to compare the image sizes.
The CV is clearly closer to the camera. Not how the pavement slopes up some, making the further back Marquis also higher up. Even a fairly small difference in distance can make a noticeable difference.
Love that pic! That Marquis looks to be the rare base model. And it has fender skirts too! Probably a special order back in the day. I’ll bet any money that car is weirdly equipped inside, too. I’m thinking A/C, AM radio, cruise control, a clock, full vinyl bench seat, and maybe a rear defroster. No power windows or locks. (Well maybe only power locks as it is a massive sedan!)
It totally reminds me of my childhood as I had a next-door neighbor that always bought stripped full-sized base model Mercury Marquis sedans. Every 3 years he would order a new one and trade in the old one. He had a white 1971 base Marquis, a red 1974, another white 1977, then a new panther – a goldish colored 1980 base Marquis sedan. He actually kept the 1980 until 1985 and got – what? Lo and behold – a loaded to the hilt Grand Marquis?? Can this be the same neighbor? As a matter of fact, he had gone to order another car and the salesperson (the same guy who sold him the last four Marquis) told him of a cancelled order on a burgundy Grand Marquis and that it was a good deal so he went for it. When I asked him about the car, he said he felt like he was in the lap of luxury! He often referred to his 1985 as a mini Lincoln! His wife loved that car, too. He kept that car for 7 years and replaced it in 1992 with a new body style silver Grand Marquis which he drove until he died in 1997, and which his wife kept driving until she passed in 2002.
If it has been an Ontario car all it’s life, more likely rear defroster but no A/C.
That would be rare – I wonder how many Marquis were built without A/C?
I expect the Marquis owner is very familiar with pulling into Petrocan stations.
“What we gonna do boss,Tommy the rats in the trunk”
“Keep quiet Mugsy and let me do the talking”
“OK boss”
Interesting that you say that, supposedly Jimmy Hoffa’s last ride was in a Grand Marquis of this vintage.
One of the great unsolved mysteries Carmine,I never knew his last ride was a Grand Marquis
To clarify, it wasn’t his own car, which was a 1974 Pontiac GrandVille 2door, that car was left at the Red Fox restaurant in the Detroit suburbs. At around 2 in the afternoon he was seen getting into a burgundy Grand Marquis.
His Pontiac was still there in the evening after Hoffa had gone missing, it was the only thing left to even prove that he was there
More here-
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_Hoffa