During the time of my last few COAL posts some big changes were under way in my household. I try not to publish too much of my dirty laundry personal stuff. But suffice it to say, things were not going so well with a certain female. And things were not going so well with my ride either (read it how you like). The family van I bought a year ago was off the road (coming up) and the other car was a real penalty box (yet to come). Luckily, in a very short period both problems were to be greatly ameliorated if not altogether solved!
For accompanying music to this post click here. I will try to spare all you readers much of the gritty bits. But my wife (and I say that with the full technical meaning) has never been one of the quietest people and one of the things she has been most outspoken about over the many years I have known her, has been about our vehicles. She is the minivan sort, I am not. It’s been a long standing disagreement with us, but I have always managed to hold back the flood gates of minivandom. But some time ago the issue came roaring back when our 4×4 van broke down. Of course that’s not all that got mentioned in that “discussion”, I will spare you. However my love of cars did factor strongly into it. But, that “discussion” could not have come at a more fateful time.
For the last several months I had been working around a women named Mandy. As I have gotten to know her, I have realized that we have a lot in common. One of those things is a love of cars. Mandy owned a 1965 Mustang when I met her. I was impressed to say the least. But as I have gotten to know her more and more, I have found that there is much more to Mandy than just cars. But I know for a fact that you dear readers don’t want to hear about that!
Mandy and her Stang
To make a long and very difficult story very short, Mandy and I started sharing an apartment about a month ago. A divorce is in the works, and Mandy and I decided to get a car that is a little more modern than the Mustang, something to kick off a new life, a new future. So the first place we went was over to the local Chevy dealer. Honestly though, most of their lineup was pretty bland, though I did like the Traverse and the Cruze a bit. But I wanted something really sporting. Now that I only need to haul kids around every other weekend, I could get something more exciting than a van or a truck.
While we were driving home we passed a Dodge dealership and Mandy said “let’s see what they have”. I knew I really didn’t want to finance a Charger or Challenger and I didn’t want a truck, so I figured, what could Dodge have that I would want? Turns out they did have something, something I wanted a lot. As soon as I saw the new Avengers I thought, wow, where have you been all my life! I liked the R/T, but the financing on it was a bit high. The SE came with a four cylinder and promised good gas mileage, so I asked to test drive it. For some reason the sales guy seemed to think I was just kidding. But after a little more discussion he agreed to let me take it for a spin, but not without some curious little chuckles.
The SE was not the car for me or Mandy; that was obvious as soon as I gave it a little gas. It was like churning butter. But I liked the rest of it. The interior was awesome, and the ride was really tight. So of course I thought an Avenger would be a perfect match for us. But that four cylinder was a real dog. When I told “Jerry” the salesman what I thought, he had just the solution, an Avenger SXT with the V6 engine. The price was right, but I had to drive it to see.
The test drive in the SXT was vastly different. The V6 pulled nicely and the slush box now had six speeds. It was very sporty and the styling rocked even more. I was sold and Mandy loved it as well. The salesman with the help of management, cut us a pretty good deal, but honestly I was sold on the new Avengers as soon as I saw them.
The ride home was like a whole different world. The interior on these cars is really nice, no more hard plastics, but soft durable materials now. The cross-hair grill styling is carried over into the interior via the steering wheel; reminds me every time I get in of how proud I am to be a Dodge owner. And the sound system is pretty good too; who cares if I can’t hook my iPod up to it! I really like the big analog gauges, they give it a certain retro feel.
But how is the handling you ask? Well I have always been a big fan of front wheel drive performance cars and this one really shines. The ride quality does not suffer considering the fine performance one can get out of it. Under-steer is not bad and the brakes are pretty decent. Turn-in is sharp with a bit of tread squirm from the factory front tires. But all in all, it is a very competitive piece of engineering.
When Dodge conceived the Avenger, they had their sights set squarely on the blue collar, working class hero. It’s really a poor man’s Aston Martin. And who the hell could ask for more than a beautiful women and an Aston Martin? I sure couldn’t, and this is as close as I think I will ever get. So no more used cars for me; I’m tired of cars with “character”, which is just poverty speak for busted shit box. Nope, I am starting over again and this time I am gonna do things right! The right girl, the right car, and no kids! At least not most of the time.
So I did have three cars left to go in COAL, but I sold one and the soon to be Ex has the others. But I know you guys will want to hear about Mandy’s Mustang and all (well not all) the things we do in it. And of course my continuing adventure in my new Avenger SXT. So stay tuned, for a whole new perspective!
Michael- So sorry hear about your troubles. I hope that things work out better this time around. It seems to have a good start. Best wishes to you and Mandy. I was amused by your choice of music, I’ve always like Warren Zevon, but I’m finding his music more relevant as time goes on. All part of growing up, I guess…
WRT to the Avenger, congrats! As a driver of a 17 year old car and in a bit of a cash crunch right at the moment, I always keep an eye out for cheap wheels that I can buy (almost) in a moment’s notice if the Rustfire were to totaled in an accident. One of my target cars is the Avenger SE.
The bad news is, I’ve never been in the “stripper” model with the 4 cyl/4 spd autobox, and from your description it sounds as bad as other people have described. But I put the words stripper in quotes because if you look at the list of equipment that the Avenger has even in the SE version, it far outclasses the 30+ year old luxury cars we like to argue about on this board. If I were to purchase one, I’d be using it for mostly commuter duties, with the occasional out of town trip. I still prefer my wife’s G6 for long distance drives, though.
I don’t know if I should mention this or not, but Chrysler recently announced the availability of an Avenger SE with the V6/6spd. Of course, who knows how long it will take for these cars to filter down to the dealer lots, and how many dealers will carry them. Even now, if I do a 100 mile radius search for a regular Avenger SE, I can only find about 10, in Michigan, no less! On top of that, I’m sure the cars will no longer be price leaders that the 4 cyl SE’s are…
Back when I sold Toyotas, you could buy a Camry LE with the V6/spd manual. It was spartan, but it was a rocket. I’d like to believe one of these V6 SE’s would be the modern Mopar corollary to the sleeper Mopars of the 60’s or at least blow the doors off of those LE Camrys.
Good luck in your future endeavors and keep us updated on the Avenger. I’ll be interested to see how it holds up.
Sir, you’re assesment regarding the Avenger is spot on.
Traveling on business frequently allows me to drive many cars; and on 3 occasions, purchased later upon returning home. (only once regretting my impulsiveness)
I recently had a ’12 Camry and thought…this is the perfect car. It is better than ever in comfort and driving characteristics, there is actual steering feedback, and you could easily cruise all day long. (though not a fan of touchscreens to change radio stations).
A subsequent trip put me in a 4cyl, 6spd Avenger. Certainly not fast, but more then adequate and the trans shifted just when you wanted it to. And more importantly, the driving experience was quite similar to the Camry. Quality abounds, great steering (a peeve of mine), and terrific freeway cruiser. Quiet, tight, firm but comfy underpinnings.
If in the market for such a car I would give serious consideration to the Dodge, an American Camry.
I got the part where you started raving about the Avenger and then remembered what day it was…
@FromaBuick6 – good catch!
omg… this is all april fools? i was buying it… but wondering??WHY Would a car nut be thrilled with the Avenger? and It Sure sounded like ad copy… Ha Ha and THANK YOU for getting me like only my Mom ever did.
Somehow that sounds wrong
My wife told me she’d leave me if I bought her a minivan.
My grandfather bought 1 Dodge, but from Classic Dodge in the DFW area. A Dodge Daytona…traded in 6 months later for a T Bird TC.
Same here. My wife: “No minivans. Ever”. She likes sedans and hatchbacks and drives a Mini Cooper currently.
Doesn’t care much for SUVs, thinks pickup trucks are for farmers and she tolerated my Outback wagon that I was driving when we met, but would never drive a wagon herself.
Oh she won’t give up her Outback, but it is a good vehicle for Idaho.
My wife used to drive an Outback sedan. She really liked that car, but was allergic to having the wagon variant for her personal vehicle. Go figure.
I’m not sure if this is an April Fool’s Day joke or not…
Of course !!
The flagrant disrespect to the ex, the gleeful “no kids”, the public admiration for a Dodge.
Well played sir…I’ve been punk’d.
I did like the car though. Honest!
(no more firing up the laptop before coffee.)
Wow, what a transformation there Michael!
That is one sweet looking ride you got there, finally a real car! 🙂
Sorry to hear of your situation with your soon to be ex but it sounds like, out of the ashes comes a new life that looks promising – and new, and I mean, new wheels, not just another broken down shit box.
I’ve been fortunate that the cars I bought – all used were more than that generally speaking, they all were in decent mechanical shape and I took several of them way up the mileage train, the 83 Civic, bought it at just under 113K in 92, sold it at just shy of 183K in ’98, the Honda Accord, I inherited it from my Dad after his death in ’98 with roughly 123K or so, took that beast up to almost 182K if I recall in early ’06 when I sold that car and both had been driven well and both been rear ended too though the Accord got the harder life of the two and spent the last 4 or so years lacking regular maintenance due to a lack of money often.
I got the truck in great shape, both physically and mechanically but it just plumb wore out at almost 237K and I now drive the little Mazda I posted about when I had to let y’all know of the truck’s demise and what I got to replace it.
So far, it’s been a great little car but still have not been able to take it on a little journey due to the wet weather still. I’m hoping April isn’t so wet and I can get out and take it somewhere other than to work and errands around town.
Good luck with your new adventures with Mandy and the Avenger.
BTW, have had plenty of butt time in the Stratus, the predecessor to this car. My Mom has a red ’04 with I think the 2.4L 4 and 4spd autobox. It’s a decent enough car and I’d gladly take off her hands if she decided to quit driving and I was in need of a car, at least that was my thought early on, now, dunno. Still a decent enough car but being a sedan, it’s not me though, but in a pinch, it’d do though.
4/1…
OK, lets assume this is real for a second… I know the feeling bro.
(Although the thing that’s making me suspicious is the picture of the Mustang and Mandy looks like it was taken in 1985. Although if you were going to prank us with a Mustang and a girl you could have at least called her… Mustang Sally.)
The girl with the Mustang looks suspiciously like the one with another of Michaels cars, April 2 here so you guys are at April1
Better?
“how proud I am to be a Dodge owner”
“I have always been a big fan of front wheel drive performance cars…”
Hahahahahahaha, file this one next to the report of the discovery of Beethoven’s 10th symphony
I was skimming the article, thinking “this is probably an April Fools joke”. Then I got to the line “I have always been a big fan of front wheel drive performance cars…” and I knew it was. 🙂
“When Dodge conceived the Avenger, they had their sights set squarely on the blue collar, working class hero. It’s really a poor man’s Aston Martin.”
Pure gold!
I soaked up that line, like butter and syrup on a pancake!
Now if I could only get paid for writing that crap
Hey Michael, have you been in the new Dodge Dart yet? If so, how is it?
I would really be interested in test driving the new Fiat product. after all, European-American partnerships have such a good history here. Remember AMC/Eagle/Renualt, or Peugeot NA?
But those were Franco-American partnerships and flopped miserably. The Dodge Dart is an Italio-American partnership and those have birthed genius cars like the De Tommaso Pantera so this should hopefully be just as good.
By this, I meant the new Dart should hopefully be just as sporty and beloved (in the future) as the Pantera is today.
I read Paul’s article and now this. These are great reads; I now feel guilty for not clicking more Google ads.
Great April 1 piece but in fact there is a lot to be said about a midlife crisis and a nice new car. It was a great experience for me.
Okay, April Fool’s and all, we rented one of these for 10 days in Florida – even with the thrashy 4 and 4 speed auto, it was a pretty decent ride on the Interstate. I liked it enough to test drive the V6 and 6 speed. Nice. The interior has been seriously improved over the previous model, and the car feels and looks well assembled compared to the previous version. Between this and a friends new 200C, I have to admit to getting some lost Mopar love back. When I saw the Dodge display at the Las Vegas Speedway over the NASCAR weekend last month I got to drool over the new Dart, the Avenger SR/T and the Ram SR/T – serious want for the Avenger SR/T – only in black though.
These are a big improvement on the star crossed previous model. The interior is much nicer, and the Pentastar is arguably best in class. Consumer Reports even rates the reliability of the closely related 200 as “Much Better than Average”. While the mid sized Mopars might still lag behind the best offerings in this highly competitive class, I can see why an informed customer might buy one now.
Looks like Mother Mopar has gone off her meds, and is about to go into her manic phase…
Three years ago I had a loaded Sebring rental on a Rocky Mountain tour. That car was awful! The seat was torture and the 2.7 V-6 hopelessly bad. Really, the only way for Chrysler after this thing was up!
Agreed. I’ve rented a lot of cars in the past couple of years, and the Sebring was by far the worst.
At least the trend at Chrysler is positive – every new model is better than the one it replaced.
Avenger?
If you want true Dodge greatness you’d go for the excellent combination of utility, timeless styling, and cutting edge CVT technology that can only be found in the Dodge Caliber.
I purposely avoided the CVT in the Caliber when I got one last year (2011 model). The 5-speed isn’t a bad match for the 2.0L.
Nice one!
April fools or not, Dodge’s going to set you up with Avengers for life with this kind of “review”.
Which is like heaven-sent blessings to someone in India with four kids and nothing but a scooter as a family vehicle.
Lol, would three Avengers equal one Charger SRT?
In the same vein I once saw a PT Cruiser with a plate that read “HLFHEMI”
> …someone in India with four kids and nothing but a scooter as a family vehicle.
Tata would like to contest that… 🙂
When I saw ‘Avenger Classic’ I thought it was like the leftover previous-generation Malibus that GM called ‘Malibu Classic’ and sold to fleets and rental car companies.
It wasn’t classic.
April fool or not, I’ll be surprised if the article doesn’t at least provoke some test drives in Avengers. Unintended consequence?
I’m guessing this is an April Fools joke. I test drove a 200 (this vehicles twin) and I was rather unimpressed. The interior is great, no complaints with materials or styling and going down the road it’s impressively quiet. The Pentastar V6 is also a real gem of a motor.
The problem is to me the front end just did not feel very planted and along with the overly soft seats it felt like an early W body with lots of sound deadening and way too much power.
We have a couple of pre-facelift V6 Avengers in our fleet at work. I had one for a couple days, and wanted so badly to hate it. It was everything I detest – hard plastic everywhere, shiny ‘leather’ trim, crap dashboard, FWD… Now I hate myself, cause it actually wasn’t too bad (I’d never buy one, but I’d happily drive that one again). Sure the plastic still sucked, but that touchscreen stereo/nav was cool and the heated seats were hot. The highlight was the engine, which sounded absolutely fantastic! It had the most wonderful rorty warble to it. But a great stereo, heated seats and an aurally delicious engine don’t make a fine car (at least not in that rapper).
You got me. You @!$#$!%! April 2 here. I’ve never been duped this bad EVER. Dirty laundry indeed. Divorce! Mandy! Mustang! Heresy! Thankfully the paeans to the Almighty Avenger started and brought reality crashing down upon me. Now to go puke to get this out of my system.
P.S.: You’re certain you won’t look for a writing job? Writers, especially auto-related, do shit like this all the time. 😀
If only somebody would pay me for that crap, I could upgrade my avenger to a caliber : )
I drove around an Avenger on just completed family vacation. The interior is nicer than the model we drove a few years ago, which is good. Decent acceleration, stable at high speeds. Fairly good fuel economy, too.
However, the biggest demerit is the visibility to the rear thanks to that big C-pillar. That’s no April Fool’s joke.
OK, even with all the goodies, all the bells and whistles, nobody is likely to compare a loaded Dodge Avenger to a BMW. They are still a pretty decent, mid-size, daily driver family sedan. The 3.6L V6 is rated 283 hp with 260 ft-lbs of torque, making it Best in Class in regards to horsepower. Fueleconomy.gov rates the 3.6L V6 at 19 city, 29 hwy. The 2.4L 4 cyl is rated 20 city, 31 hwy with the 6 speed auto., and 21 city, 30 hwy with the 4 speed auto. And, the Avenger IS sportier-looking that the Camry, Accord or Altima.