Here’s an accomplishment few can (or might want to) claim: I once bought a house and a car the same day. It all sounds so grand doesn’t it? Well, as Paul Harvey used to say, stay tuned for the rest of the story…
It was early June 1998. I had found a nice, modest house for purchase so Marie and I had somewhere of our own to be subsequent to our upcoming nuptials. There was a contract, all inspections were done, and we were at the point of awaiting the closing date.
My new job was going rather well and I was excited, yet nervous, for what the next few months would be bringing me. Getting married and buying a house, all within three weeks, was a bit overwhelming but in a good way. It was an exciting time in life.
Despite the flurry of activity I had going, my roving automotive eye was still quite active. In retrospect this was sort of a fun challenge; while my ’55 Chevrolet had been sold, I was about to add another member to my automotive harem.
Also in retrospect, it seems I had been inadvertently subscribing to the Jay Leno philosophy of “one woman and many cars is cheaper than one car and many women.”
Thus it was one day within this narrow window of time when I was between the small towns of Bernie and Malden, in the northern fringes of the Missouri Bootheel, I found a somewhat weary looking 1981 Chrysler LeBaron. What caught my eye, and aroused my suspicions, were the police wheels and hubcaps.
Stopping to take a look at the car, someone related to the owner came outside. We started talking, the hood was opened, and I subtly examined the data plate Chrysler had been so kind as to put on the left wheel well. Sure enough, it was stamped with an “A38”, which is Chrysler speak for a factory police package car. I knew I had stumbled onto a rare critter.
At first glance this is just another M-body with a fancier grille. Such is true. However, if one gets all geeky about it, which I was/am, this car was approaching unicorn status. In 1981 only, Chrysler Corporation slathered all their police goodies on a Chrysler branded M-body. Why?
Model year 1980 had been the last year for the Dodge Aspen and Plymouth Volare, with the M-body replacing it. Was there a big portion of Aspen/Volare in the M-body? Yes, but Chrysler had made a switch in model name and body designation.
Yet Plymouth, as was ever more frequently the case, was given the cold shoulder and denied an M-body for 1981. While most people associate the M-body Plymouth as being a Gran Fury, which is correct, Plymouth had not yet made the transition.
The 1981 Gran Fury was still an R-body.
Fielding a Chrysler branded police car was likely a move of some expediency by Chrysler Corporation, as 1981 was a year they were focused on their new K-cars. There had been Chrysler branded police cars as recently as the 1979 Newport and dating back to the early 1960s so the M-body LeBaron wasn’t exactly without some form of precedent.
For being a one-year wonder, it is undoubtedly safe to assume production numbers were minimal with survival rates being quite thin. Researching this article I found pictures of marked ’81 LeBarons having been used by the Cities of Des Moines, Iowa and Dallas, Texas (seen here) along with the Putnam County New York Sheriff. I have seen pictures of similar LeBarons being used by New York City. Mine supposedly came from Winter Garden, Florida.
The M-body LeBaron was the best selling Chrysler branded automobile for 1981. However, that wasn’t any extraordinary feat as the Newport sold only 3,600 examples and the rapidly fading Cordoba sold around 21,000 units. In comparison, the LeBaron was a blockbuster with around 43,000 finding a home.
It’s doubtful a very high percentage went to police use. In fact I would wager the nearly 4,000 LeBaron wagons made that year greatly outnumber the police spec cars. How often do you see one of these wagons?
I bought this two-barrel 318 equipped LeBaron for the grand sum of $250. At this price I figured it was not going to cause me to have a foreclosure on my new home. Speaking of my new home, this certainly figures into this reminisce.
The day I was to retrieve the Chrysler was the same day I was due to close on my new house. My father was accompanying me. I had driven down to Cape Girardeau in my ’96 Thunderbird; my father in the new 1998 Dodge Ram 1500 he had purchased the week before. Incidentally, he still owns this pickup today.
The closing was scheduled to last one hour. Sitting down in the bank’s conference room with my father and Patty, my real estate agent, the group of bank employees starting thrusting various documents at me for signature.
From czechleaders.com
Here’s where my charismatic and bubbly personality kicked in. Too many of these various legal documents had spelling and grammatical errors. It was terrible and such blatant, repetitive sloppiness drives me crazy – granted, none of us are immune to grammatical errors or other typos, but these documents had been proofread and used repeatedly. Trying to be ethical, I was politely and calmly asking for clarification on each error I found or asking if I should correct it in an effort to avoid any possible future unpleasantries. I was likely the unpleasantry for them, but so be it.
Amongst all the documents to sign was one stating I had not been discriminated against in any way. When presented with the non-discrimination affidavit, I declined to sign it. This caused some consternation among the bank employees. I felt the need to diplomatically explain myself as I also knew the old “it’s not what you say but how you say it” scenario was at work, as it so often is with personal interactions.
“Well, here’s why I cannot sign it. When I first visited you to open an account and apply for a mortgage, I dealt with Sylvia. She made numerous derogatory statements about my youth, such as my being accustomed to being sent home with homework, and she was quite condescending throughout our conversation. She even compared me to her irresponsible daughter who happens to be my age. It was unprofessional and, as you likely know, I sent your bank president a letter explaining my encounter with Sylvia and elaborating on my disappointment with her behavior. There has been no response which gives the appearance of condoning such conduct. After meeting with Sylvia I almost closed my account but I also knew you were a better fit as you don’t sell your mortgages.
“So, no, I will not be signing that form. Sylvia, on behalf of your bank, treated me like shit.”
Ok, so diplomacy isn’t my strongest talent.
Not Patty, but you get the idea
The room was nearly silent. I say nearly as Patty was convulsing from stifling a laugh; all of the bank representatives had varying degrees of shock. Patty knew the entire situation beforehand and she had also dealt with Sylvia. I was then barraged with various apologies from the bank employees. The closing took nearly 2.5 hours.
Fast forward twenty-odd years…in 2019 my parents relocated from Southern Illinois to Cape Girardeau. My mother called Patty for her assistance. Patty remembered me vividly; I suspect there are reasons other than I was one of her first clients after she relocated from Los Angeles in early 1998.
After taking possession of my house, I swapped vehicles with my father, dropped a few things off at my new house, and went to fetch my Chrysler.
Not his, but close enough
As another aside, trailering that Chrysler back with my father’s 360 (5.9 liter) powered Dodge was an epiphany. Every vehicle I had trailered prior had been pulled with my father’s 1984 Ford F-150 and its 300 straight six – let’s just say this was a totally different experience. That Dodge did not once strain pulling that 3,600 pound Chrysler – and the Dodge only had around 400 miles on the odometer, so the engine wasn’t even broken in. That Dodge is a terrific tow rig.
The Chrysler ran quite well. I had driven it onto the rental trailer and I drove it around my parent’s property when I dropped the car off at their house later that day. The reasons for the sale of the Chrysler were immediately obvious; the glove compartment had several nasty letters from collection agencies.
Never have I seen any Chrysler branded vehicle so spartan. My Chrysler had vinyl seats front and rear, rubber floor covering (the red was a carpet remnant that came with the car), and an AM radio. There was no tilt wheel, no cruise control, no power windows. The only obvious option it had was air-conditioning. Despite this, it was mighty comfortable to drive.
From what I was told, the owner’s brother worked for the City of Winter Garden and had purchased this Chrysler at auction, giving it to their mother. The mother later sold the car to the daughter, from whom I purchased the car. Also, as I was told and the driver’s door in the picture below helps attest to, the car had originally been white but had been shot with primer, giving it this blue-gray color.
One of the tail lights was broken, which gave credibility to the statement it had been bumped in the rear. A visit to a salvage yard netted me a set of tail lights, but I don’t think I ever replaced the broken one (I never licensed the car). I did replace the spark plugs, which made that Chrysler run even better.
I also replaced the hood as the original one looked like it had had an intimate rendezvous with a ball-peen hammer. The replacement came from a dark blue Chrysler Fifth Avenue and one could not really tell a profound difference in color.
Knowing my Chrysler was going to be sitting for a bit, I gave the rather new rear tires to my father-in-law for use on his Crown Victoria. At that point in time, Marie had wanted to start a small business of cake decorating; I figured the Chrysler would make a memorable delivery car for her. Mechanically, I had no concerns with the car despite it approaching twenty years of age.
For a variety of reasons, the business never happened, which eroded my need for the Chrysler.
I had also not fully anticipated the changes in my life due to getting married, particularly the desire and need to spend my time with other things. Like with having children, some life changes are simply too difficult to comprehend if you haven’t experienced it.
That was the challenge I had with the Chrysler. It was like a flame in the wind; its flame of promise kept being compromised by the winds of a changing life. I was not able to really do anything with it.
While I kept my Chrysler limbered up, I realized it needed to go to a good home. Even at that time, I realized my role in this Chrysler’s life was to get it to a place in which the owner would know what he had and would appreciate it for what it was. Such would have been unlikely to happen if somebody other than me would have bought the car in 1998; in other words, one could say I saved it from a worse fate.
Putting the Chrysler up for sale sometime in 2000, it quickly found a buyer from Ohio who knew what the car was. I hope he gave this near unicorn the attention it so deserved.
(Author’s Note: A Flame In The Wind aired on the American Broadcasting Company from December 28, 1964 to December 16, 1966.)
Oh, there is so much here. First, if I had ever known about the 81 police package LeBaron, I had forgotten about it. And I don’t think I have ever seen that 2 spoke steering wheel design before – it looks like the 3 spoke of around the same time but with the bottom spoke gone.
My mother was shopping for a Horizon in 1980 when these were freshly restyled. But for the Horizon there would have been mighty little floor traffic in that dealer. I liked these quite a bit, as the higher trim versions were gorgeous inside. There was a wagon like the one in your picture in the showroom, identical but in red. I really wanted that one.
It is a shame when a cool car no longer fits your life. I have some of those stories in the que for future dates. And there are few more things fun than the righteous intransigence you got to exercise in that real estate closing.
These police package LeBarons were a quirky one-year wonder. Stumbling upon it was absolute dumb luck.
I really wanted to keep this car due to the novelty of its rarity. It was never going to be valuable, but that was part of the novelty appeal. I hope it is still in one piece.
We are on our fourth house. In the subsequent three closings I never had to be as candid as I was that day. However, my dealings leading up to the closing are a totally different story. Stay tuned.
Ugh, having only purchased one home (which will be paid off within a year – yay!), I am not looking forward to having to do paperwork on another whenever that happens. It was bad enough refinancing back in 2011.
We are on House #4. Let’s not talk about paying them off, other than the first three would have been paid off by now. I am glad to hear yours will soon be paid off.
Stay tuned, there are some more real estate related endeavors to come in a few weeks.
I agree; the stress of buying our first house nearly killed me. We rented for ages and bought our first house just a few years ago. Fortunately, we like the place.
Jason’s “discrimination” story reminded me of something that occurred during our house-buying time as well. When filling out one of the numerous forms where we had to supply our personal information, the mortgage lady noticed my and my wife’s birthdates. My wife is a few years older than me, and the lady laughed and said to her “you’re quite a cougar!” The unprofessionalism was shocking – fortunately neither my wife or I are easily offended and we laughed about it afterwards. Somehow I don’t recall having to sign the non-discrimination document afterwards, but I’m sure we did.
Second, on buying a house and car on the same day… when we arrived at our house for the final inspection prior to closing, I was surprised that the seller’s diesel Isuzu pickup was still in the driveway – not looking like it was going anywhere soon. The seller explained that he was giving it to a friend, but the friend “forgot” to pick it up the previous week. I was sure that the seller (who was a bit odd to begin with) would just hand me the title at some point, and I’d end up with a pickup to dispose of. Fortunately, within the next few hours, the friend actually arrived, and I didn’t have to deal with that.
Another great COAL entry. All the details you remember, add immensely to the depth and interest, of each these entries. Very clever with the soap opera serial tie in. Thanks for all this work!
The largest cab company in my city had a sizeable number of M-body LeBarons in their fleet, during the early 80s. Painted in either midnight blue or black, with taxi hub caps, rocker panel moldings, and whitewalls, your Chrysler strongly channels their look and feel. For me, appearing more like an urban cab than a police/detective’s unmarked car. Increasing the stealth significantly.
Amazing, your dad’s Ram is still on the road. As they were significantly vulnerable to rust, during that era.
Thank you. You have me wondering from whom or where those taxis were procured.
There are a number of factors playing in regard to his rust-free Ram. Even the quick to crack dashboard is still pristine.
Since he has been retired for years, it never leaves the garage during inclement weather. Helping with that is his living rather far south where snow is infrequent.
Also, while it has been driven a lot at times (it’s been to every province in Canada), it has only accumulated around 135,000 miles.
All that said, it has had less than fifty miles put on it so far this calendar year, which certainly helps keep rust away. However, that can introduce other unpleasant issues.
Your dad sounds like a very attentive and careful owner, who believes in taking great care of his vehicles. Terrific to see.
I tried doing some research, but it’s near impossible to know how many LeBaron’s may have been in the taxi fleet. They had a number of Diplomats and Gran Furys as well, through the mid 80s. They used black fuselage Plymouths and mid-sized Coronets/Monacos thru the late 70s, but I don’t recall ever seeing any R-body cabs in their fleet. As this was in Canada, they may have been manufactured in Windsor.
“Your dad sounds like a very attentive and careful owner, who believes in taking great care of his vehicles.”
Would you believe he is the exact opposite? Given he has only once in the last 30 years washed a vehicle his Dodge seems to have a prophylactic film of funk that has kept all the bad karma away from it.
The one time in the last 30 years when he did wash a vehicle, it was their 2020 Escape in May of 2021. The wash water running down the street looked like an oil spill. A funeral prompted the washing.
lol Some owners place priority on the genuinely important means to maintain a vehicle a long time. Like protecting it from winter and road salt, or UV rays. Dust collection on the surfaces, though unattractive, won’t destroy his truck. Beyond a few extra paint and glass scratches. At least that’s what appears to be his rationale? 🙂
His philosophy is “a car is supposed to work for me, I’m not supposed to work for it”.
He didn’t appreciate my pointing out he had to exert some type of work to have the money to purchase it, thus making his philosophy somewhat flawed.
When I bought my current condo as part of the process of moving forward with my second divorce, my real estate agent (and her husband) were friends of ours and we used her recommended mortgage broker.
I went through the paperwork quickly before the closing and seeing such familiar pages thought it was the same stuff I had seen and signed four times before.
When I was notified by the mortgage bank rep that there was an additional fee of some sort that was not included in the “Fees” section in the front of the document I balked holding my pen in the air, explained my confusion, and was curtly informed that it was “… right there in writing…” on page 9 (or some page – don’t recall).
I read the relevant section, knew I had missed it, and said “OK, you got me; I missed it; I never thought there would be more fees after reading the “Fees” section in the front; … yup – You got me”.
I signed the document and wrote another check.
My real estate agent (and friend) was silent.
A few months after moving into the condo I received a letter and a check for half the amount of the fee from the mortgage bank saying they were aware of my negative reaction to the obscure location of the fee in the mortgage agreement and hoped this partial refund would help express their concern for my feelings. They also noted that they would now include that specific fee in the “Fees Section” of the mortgage paperwork.
Shortly after that they sold the mortgage to someone who then resold it to …
So far I’ve bought five homes (2 condos, 1 co-op, and 2 houses) and refinanced two of them multiple times when rates fell. Like accepting the terms of a software package, I sign, sign, sign, and pay, pay, pay, which coincidentally is not too much unlike getting a divorce.
I always like the scene in my son Will’s favorite movie “Twister” where the Bill Paxton character is trying to get the Helen Hunt character to sign their divorce agreement, but she wants to read it the one page she missed first. Smart woman!
That extra fee business stings, particularly with a supposed friend being involved and remaining silent.
The mortgage company does deserve credit for trying to rectify things.
Thinking about it, I did mention the closing on our current house although it’s in an upcoming chapter. Having this series mostly written before anything is published does help in many ways.
Part of me suspects there will be a House #5 in the future. I shudder to think about that…
I didn’t mean to imply that that my real estate agent’s silence meant that she didn’t care.
She was indeed silent, but also embarrassed and incensed. It was she who complained to the bank and that was the cause of the letter, partial refund, and revised document format.
The bank didn’t want to lose her client references and paid attention to her complaint.
Thank you. That does cast a better light on the situation.
Your Realtor shouldn’t be reading everything to do with your loan paperwork and/or weighing in on your personal financial data or fees you agree to, it’s frankly none of their business, all they need or are entitled to ask for is a formal letter stating what the lender has agreed to lend you so that your property search is in the realm of financial reality. (this is different from the Realtor advocating on your behalf after the fact with the result being a business decision of the lender in Rlplaut’s case being concerned about their future business, you’ll note they really didn’t care about Rlplaut, just the Realtor’s future business)
Your Mortgage Broker or Lender should be perfectly happy to sit with you and go over EVERY SINGLE WORD of EVERY SINGLE DOCUMENT that they ever present to you in person or electronically. And you (every buyer) should actually do so. The transactions (house/mortgage) are related however they are (usually) handled by two separately licensed people from two separate licensing entities and represent two different companies (with some exceptions where someone actually did get both licenses) and usually neither side is legally competent or licensed to discuss the other’s business or documents.
Each of those people should (and if they are good, do so in writing) highly recommend that you read every single word of every single document and ask any question that arises of the person that sent that particular document and should be able to answer any of those questions on the spot and/or recommend that you have qualified legal representation to review the documents for the single largest purchase you are likely ever going to make.
There are no longer fees that “magically appear” at closing, by law you now get every number at least three days before then to review and challenge and often multiple times before. As in every profession there are people that are more or less competent, capable, and/or professional in their field. Realtors and Mortgage people CAN be your actual friend, but they are also in business to earn a living, that living always comes at someone else’s expense – just like every other earner anywhere whether they are paid by private industry or the public taxpayer.
Very, very few people actually do ask any questions, it is hard to believe they are all so competent as to know exactly what every number is for that they don’t need to ask. Frankly they really have themselves to blame when they are unhappy about something later.
@Jim, All this talk of agents/brokers sitting at the closing table has me baffled. Their business is the negotiation of the purchase and sale agreement, not the loan (in most cases anyway). To give advice about the lending paperwork could be considered the practice of law w/o a license, at least in my state, and of course could result the loss of the real estate license.
I bought my first house in 1988 and my Agent at the time told me that when I asked if he would be present at the closing table.
Ditto for the 3rd part of the transaction the transfer and recording of the deed and loan, questions about that should be discussed with the closing agent, who at least in my state needs their own appropriate licensing, or to be a licensed lawyer.
I had forgotten you’d owned this car – I know you’d mentioned it before, and I’d never heard of the LeBaron police package beforehand. A true unicorn, so I wholeheartedly approve!
I particularly like that in the photo of the Dallas police cruiser, it’s shown with the pentastar hood ornament (I’ve enlarged it below). The only thing better would be if it had the fake crystal-looking hood ornament that appeared in later years.
And regardless of air conditioning, that dark, smooth vinyl bench seat doesn’t look like an enjoyable place for an officer to spend a hot Florida day.
This Chrysler was a blip on the radar. I owned it for a couple years but never licensed nor insured it. I drove it a lot around my parent’s property, but that was the extent of it. A wasted opportunity in a way, but it (hopefully) went to a good home.
They’re quite cold in winter climates as well.
That photo of an ’81 Gran Fury–is that from a brochure, or a magazine ad? The line “It’s tradition of excellence continues” jumped out at me. The copywriter meant “its,” not “it’s.” Did you slip that in to see if we were as detail-oriented as you?
The ’81 Gran Fury picture was obtained from oldcarbrochures.com. Good catch.
In many ways I am not detail oriented; my wife would happily confirm this for you.
I’m on house #4 here. The first one was purchased 40 years ago next year, but I went through #s 1 – 3 relatively quickly. I’ve been in the current one for nearly 25 years and would be quite happy if I didn’t have to move again. Knock on wood. In all of those transactions – and I’ve done a couple of additional ones related to various estates – I’ve never had any problems with the banks or the lawyers, who I’ve always found to be fair, knowledgeable and professional. This is good in that I have in more than once case actually needed them to help me out with various misrepresentations and issues caused by the real estate agents. It’s probably best that I not get started on my feelings about real estate agents. Let’s just say that in my opinion, I wouldn’t be surprised if your Sylvia wound up in that profession.
Good question about the LeBaron wagon. From what I can tell, those are actually relatively rare. I think that they were never very popular when new (being Chrysler’s first really down-sized wagon) and tended not to be treated well by owners. Today, I think they’re still considered kind of awkward cars due to their size/appearance but their rarity does make the existing ones surprisingly valuable.
In my state, the use of attorneys for doing written purchase/sale contracts was still occasionally done when I started practicing in the mid 80s. But not long before that our Supreme Court had determined that realtors filling out pre-printed forms was not practicing law so that’s how it’s done now. It works fine most of the time but I have found that there is a lot less advocacy and a lot more emphasis on ignoring potential issues in order to get the deal done so everyone can get paid. Our local Board of Realtors forms are highly tilted towards the seller’s interests (and even more highly tilted to eliminating any realtor liability) so most buyers are not that well represented.
Your first paragraph hits the nail on the head. We were in House #1 for three years (not planned that way); House #2 for 5.5 years; House #3 for nearly five years with another 20 months on the market; now, House #4, will be 7 years next month.
We had more real estate agent issues here than with the first three houses combined. Stay tuned, I go into detail with that. We have also had issues with relocation companies, primarily when we moved from St. Joseph to Hannibal. They encouraged Marie to forge my signature and I will be covering my subsequent discussions with them. This was also the company that wired my money to the wrong bank account where it sat for ten days.
My only complaint about the real estate business is how the 6% (typical) commission has increased without actually increasing due to the addition of separate fees, such as paperwork reproduction, paperwork courier, etc. Used to be that none of those fees were included as the realtor paid for them out of the 6% commission. When we sold our old house four years ago, I specified that I wasn’t willing to pay any fees other than the commission. Only one agreed and actually followed through with his promise. Also only charged me 5% commission. Still easy money for him since the house garnered three over list offers on the first day (pre pandemic times).
FYI, there is no “standard” or “legally mandated” commission percentage in real estate (there can’t be, it’s viewed as collusion, we aren’t even allowed to discuss it among brokers). 6% is not uncommon though (with half of that immediately going to the other side so your guy/gal doesn’t actually get 6%, I’ll note) but is absolutely negotiable as long as it’s done up front. Many people don’t ask. Some agents won’t negotiate which is their right, just like any other business that sets their own prices/rates. Some will, just like any other business that sets their own prices/rates. What you pay is not reflective of what you will receive as far as service goes with the general caveat that it’s unlikely you get something great for close to nothing. I once negotiated a significant discount off a new pair of shoes at Nordstrom, EVERYthing is negotiable if you have a willing buyer and a willing seller and someone initiates the conversation.
I’d happily get paid instead based on an hourly fee charged to either a buyer or seller (like a lawyer) that I would consider appropriate for my level of real estate professionalism, knowledge, advocacy, potential liability and integrity) while documenting every minute spent on a buyer or seller’s behalf (probably 3/4’s of which aren’t seen by or in the company of said buyer or seller). There are quite a few cases where I’d be money ahead that way. It does go both ways…My wife and I do well in the field, but aren’t necessarily encouraging our kids to enter it and aren’t really looking to expand it significantly more, if at all, while continually exploring and investing in other opportunities as well, you don’t just wake up and cash 6% checks all day. If it were really that easy and rewarding, you should enter the field! 🙂
Years ago Marie looked into being a real estate agent. The 6% was a customary thing although, as you correctly note, that is negotiable. It could fluctuate by market as I’ve seen both 5% and 7%.
She also learned of that 6% half goes to the other agent (to the buyer’s agent if selling and vice versa and which only stands to reason), leaving 3%. In turn, were she working for / with a broker, the broker then got a cut – about a third of her 6% if memory serves. So that gets the agent down to 2% before all associated costs for driving, advertising, etc.
When we purchased our house in St. Joe our buyer’s agent had enough other income and sold houses simply because she enjoyed doing it. She said the last house she sold had netted her about $3 per hour after expenses based upon her husband’s calculations.
In the late 1950s my mother became a real estate agent and had to sell her reliable 2 door 1950 Buick Riviera and get a four door car that unfortunately was an unreliable 1957 Chrysler.
My definition of real estate sales: A business where people, mostly women, must make appointments to meet strangers at night in empty houses.
The pay was like the Chrysler – not reliable. This also proved to be a job where people were often pressured to reduce their pay (commission) in order to seal a deal.
It’s a tough business, especially when currently impacted by pandemics, extreme heat, short inventory, flood risk evaluations, tests for termites, radon, mold, and underground oil tank leaks, checks for plumbing and electrical code violations, and now – rising mortgage rates.
Back then, my mother persevered in real estate for few years and finally left that field and got a job selling at JFK’s Duty Free Shops. She loved the steady pay and the stream of celebrities passing through her shop.
Thank you, but I’ll point out that your definition (likely meant to have humor involved) has changed for the better.
A perhaps surprisingly high number of female (as well as male) agents nowadays pack a gun or at the least pepper or bear spray and many are well versed in self defense along with having prearranged safety arrangements made before meeting anyone anywhere. It’s extremely rare to have an agent meet anyone at night, for the first time, in a strange vacant and dark location, and seriously discouraged. Many agents refuse meetings at night, as what’s the point, you can’t see half of the property due to darkness and nobody works every daytime hour seven days a week with no other available time. You make the 50’s sound so great when that was the only option 🙂
One is more likely to come to serious physical harm or death, let me check the notes I made recently, oh yes, while going to or teaching second grade of elementary school, grocery shopping or being a grocery clerk, or perhaps while at a music concert.
The (bitterly) humorous part is where a seller willingly engages an agent at whatever fully negotiable pay rate they BOTH willingly agree to in writing up front with both sides having every opportunity to cordially part ways, the agent actually does their job and actually gets someone to buy the house quickly and at or above the desired price and does enough work to ensure the transaction goes smoothly and as hoped in a reasonable time frame, and the next thing that happens is the seller complaining everywhere about how much they “had to” pay for how little work (that they saw) occurred.
When I bought my current house I directly called the listing agent on the sign. Since I had found the house myself I didn’t need the MLS access and I was prepared to handle my own paperwork and negotiations. The listing agent and I got along just fine. Better than fine because in a booming market I became her very, very favorite offer (which allowed her to keep the entire 6% for herself.) I got regular calls on competing offers so that I knew what was happening. My offer (less than listing) got her recommendation over a higher offer. The agent said it was because the other buyer had given signs of being difficult to work with. Whatever, it worked for me. Of course, that method only works in limited circumstances which includes both sides being reasonable and professional.
Wow, red flag on the play and certainly an agent that was playing loose with the fiduciary duty owed to the Seller as the the listing agent. So I’d say that only works in limited circumstances when someone ISN’T being professional.
“Still easy money for him since the house garnered three over list offers on the first day (pre pandemic times).”
Would you consider that perhaps your agent just did his job well for the money you both agreed to up front and ended with a result that should have pleased you?
Would you have preferred that your house sit on the market for six months and sell for 20% under your asking price? Would the agent in that case have “earned” his money better, after all he likely had to do far more work in that case.
Some houses sell themselves, most do not. There is a fine balance of correct pricing (neither too high nor too low), good advertising which includes photography and determining how best to show the place off, reputation of the agent involved in their professional community, as well as timing. Even if you get three (or thirty) offers in one day because above things worked out, there is then more skill involved in determining the one best offer (not necessarily just the highest number), that is most likely to result in a closing at the end and then shepherding the whole thing across the finish line. For every single conversation you had with your representative, he likely had literally a dozen others with various involved parties.
A car I’ve never heard of, nicely written. Your performance in the bank was excellent, and satisfying to read, in particular!
As for the M body, I always hated the front clips, especially the Chrysler. When I was in the single digits, my parents bought a house in a subdivision, and our neighbor across the street had a Fifth Avenue. I always thought the turnsignals above the headlights on those were goofy looking, and I even made a similar statement to my mom about a different one we saw in front of Thrifty Foods. She shusshed me as the owner was right there with their window down (lol oh to be an oblivious kid again).
That neighbor, a cantankerous older single guy who smoked cigars constantly, never seemed to adapt to living in a neighborhood with so many children. I don’t know if that’s why, but he eventually moved out, and this charming elderly couple bought the place, and owned (amongst other cars like a Chevyota Nova) a last-of-the-RWDs Oldsmobile Ninety Eight. It was so beautiful and stately, and riding in it with them is something I still remember, the green pillow-top velour was so comfortable. It’s still one of my ideal fullsize cars. In my eyes, it was everything the Chrysler wished it was.
Wow. You undertook three of the highest stress level things in life: Getting married, buying a house and a car. All within days! That’s impressive!
I always love reading stories about old cars, but especially when it comes to old police cars since I used to be a police officer. In another article on here, I told my story about my 1988 Diplomat. I sure wish I had that car now. I still think my favorite police car of all time was the 1980 and 1981 Plymouth Grand Fury (just like the yellowish colored one in the ad above). Back in the late 1970’s and early 80’s, our neighbor (back in NW Illinois) was a state trooper. In the harsh winters, he had an agreement with my dad to park his squad on our farm since we lived next to the highway and he lived down a very long road that would often drift closed. All he had to do was jump on his tractor and drive a short distance across the field, jump in his squad and take off. I spent many a day staring at and walking around his patrol cars. He did this for many years, so I had the chance to see several different models. The St. Regis/Grand Fury of 1980/81 were my faves.
“You undertook three of the highest stress level things in life: Getting married, buying a house and a car. All within days!”
For whatever reason, I had never thought about that. But you are indeed correct as all three can be stress-inducing.
Growing up, we lived near an Illinois state patrolman as well. His older sister was a friend of my mother’s, but that is simply a reflection of small town-dom. Anyway, I vividly remember the LTDII he had for a brief while, followed by a Caprice/Impala wagon.
…not even they who typeset the cover of that 1981 Gran Fury brochure. I guess a copyeditor was an unaffordable luxury for Chrysler at the time.
I had no idea these existed. I can certainly relate to buying a car unusually nifty enough to make my socks roll up and down, then having my plans and dreams for it scuttled by reality—and to the shakeup-and-shift in one’s priorities when married versus single.
Great stories, well told!
Thank you.
The only reason I knew about these was due to a book I had purchased a year or two before. It was the second of a pair, entitled something along the lines of “Dodge, Chrysler, and Plymouth Police Cars (or some such) 1979 to 1996” by Ed Sanow. It was print jumping to real life – read about a rare car, then find one.
Starting off, I was worried readers would find this series boring. It sounds like that may not be the case, which is a relief.
Speaking of sock rolling, I think next week’s has a few little ditties that might cause some sock rolling. And it’s nothing about house buying.
Ha! I hadn’t noticed that. Maybe the copy editors were so worried that someone would type “Grand Fury” instead, that they missed the rest of the text.
When I was working in Los Angeles back in the early 1980’s the Los Angeles School District police department used these LeBarons. After receiving some citizen complaints about their department using these “fancy Chryslers.” They pulled off the Chrysler emblems and then nobody noticed that they weren’t Dodge Diplomats.
Quite a difference in perception caused by one versus another name badge that cost something like 3¢ to make! People made similar complaints about Caprice cop cars somewhere around Denver, because they came with what looked like fancy wheels.
The turn signals over the headlights on these is often criticized, I actually like the look, it gives a lazy relaxed appearance, of course the car then needs a 360 4bbl so it does not act lazy.
As a kid, I thought the high turnsignal look to be awkward, like eyebrows. But there’s a minor practical benefit. Like the high mount third brake light, these high turnsignals may be slightly more visible to other drivers.
A nice if rare car .
I too like police and commercial cars, for $250 I’da kept it and $pent too much $ sorting it out, after the taillights and hood, why not paint it and trim the interior.? .
IIRC these drove very well indeed .
As far as house buying and selling, I have as of yet to meet an honest or professional realtor or bank loan officer .
I took the time to read every page of those damned documents and yes, there was plenty of errors and blank spots they couldn’t explain….
Every time they tried hard to rush me into just signing without reading, I flat refused and insisted on a detailed accounting of closing co$T$, this reduced them by 50 % .
-Nate
Another terrific entry in the inimitable Jason Shafer style. Really appreciate the detail, writing, and personal perspective you provide in these great essays. I appreciate that you appreciated what you knew you had with this ex-police LeBaron.
It’s telling that Chrysler was so cash poor that they couldn’t even afford a decent proofreader to catch and fix the improper “it’s” in the ’81 Gran Fury ad to the correct, possessive “its”. (Watch this happen to me, like, eight times in my next essay.)
Great stuff, friend.
Catching up on this a bit late, but thanks for sharing another chapter of the Shafer chronicles that I had not heard about before, and for that matter, I had totally forgotten that these existed as a gap-year replacement for low end/cop cars because of Plymouth’s absence.
I had to chuckle at your forthright assessment of Sylvia! I initially though that I would have lacked the courage to act as you did, but then I remembered something…
30+ years ago when we were planning to move from northern VA to Charlottesville in the central part of the state, my wife called a few realtors to get a feel for what might be available. This was before Zillow and the internet, and before those real estate flyers provided street addresses of houses for sale. One of the realtors she spoke to goes by the name of Tommy (he’s still active today).
We then drove to Charlottesville over a weekend and looked at open houses and also met with sales reps for new housing plans. We did not have an agent. Not too long afterward, Tommy called my wife and she told him about our trip. He was livid, thinking we owed it to him to use his services.
I called Tommy back from work and basically told him to stuff it, telling him my wife was very independent-minded, and we didn’t need an agent to cart us around showing us multiple houses. In fact, for none of our 3 house purchases did we have a buyer’s agent.
I am late getting to this, but enjoyed another installment in this entertaining series. As rare as these LeBaron cop cars are, this story brought to mind some examples that were local to me at the time. An affluent suburb of Chicago near where I grew up bought a number of these LeBaron police cruisers to replace older Furies and Monacos in 1981 and caught a lot of flack for doing so. It seems 1981 was a recession year and some village residents felt buying Chryslers rather than Plymouths or Dodges for the police fleet was too extravagant, bordering on insulting to those who were jobless or otherwise hurting that year. The city manager of the municipality must have had really thick skin (or more likely was politically well-connected), as the Chryslers were replaced by Volvos a few years later.
Never bought a car and a house in the same day, but did within a couple of months…though not my current car, it was my current house…also finished up my graduate degree and my grandfather passed away (the same month). At least for me, lots more changes in a given year compared to now, but I think that’s pretty common.
As for the ’81 Chrysler…that’s actually the year I bought my ’78 Scirocco. My Dad had an ’80 Dodge Omni, and I came close to buying one of the same, but back then wasn’t very interested in one of these, though, mostly because I had just slid into a guardrail on black ice on my ’74 Datsun 710, and I really wanted something with FWD….a heavier car with RWD would have probably been good too, but gas shortages were still not a dim memory in 1981, so even if I wanted one of these I would have probably been dissuaded from buying one. Didnt’ drive an ’81, but working as a transporter for Hertz 3 years prior I drove a Dodge Diplomat, which I think isn’t too different, many times, even the 2 door (boat tail) couple. I liked them a lot, realized they were likely the last of their type, but also didn’t think they were for me, guess I was pretty conservative but interest rates were also sky high in 1981, especially for used cars, and I didn’t want to have to curtail my driving, now living 5 hours away from my parents and made frequent visits to their home. Only lived in the NE another couple years before moving to Texas (40 years ago) where RWD wouldn’t be much of a liability, though gas prices still a concern.