Photo from the Cohort by Colin.
This story will be about a man and his car.
The man was Cliff, he was a remarkable man to me as we had something in common, but in reverse.
I met Cliff when we hired him at our hardware store. He was a man who’d suffered from alcoholism for a long time, but he had been dry for many years by the time we met. He had gone through the 12 steps; the most important to him was asking for forgiveness from those he’d hurt. Three key people would be his ex-wife and his two sons.
Meanwhile, I am the child of an alcoholic, so that’s common in reverse threads.
So we went to meetings and spent many hours learning from each other. Cliff was also a car salesman for many years, which is another thing we had in common.
1974 Caprice image from the web.
Cliff had terminal cancer when by the time we met and asked my father-in-law, Paul, and me to let him work as much as he physically could. The car he drove was a 1974 Caprice Classic; it was a harvest gold color with tan vinyl seats. It was equipped very nicely and had the 400-4 barrel. The sad thing was the rust. Oh boy, did it have rust!
Cliff and I actually spent a day using fiberglass tiger hair, Bondo, and silicon caulking to keep some water out. After doing that, we drove to dinner when it started raining hard. There was so much water coming in that pulling down the sun visors created a neat “Niagara Falls” effect.
Still, he was proud of his car and ability to drive right up to the end of his life.
1974 Caprice image from the web.
Towards the end, he was living in a rented room. I would take him coffee and one plain donut every day until the end. Having become friends with his ex-wife after he passed away, we went together to collect his possessions. She handed me the keys and title to that Caprice and said: “Cliff and I talked, and he wanted you to have this car. He knows it isn’t much, but he told me you two had the best time working on it, something his sons would never do.”
About the sons, sadly they never gave him forgiveness.
Despite how rough it was, I loved that old Caprice and squeezed another year or two out of it. In the end, the flywheel started losing teeth, and at that point, it was just too much work to replace it.
A boat broker bought the car from me for $500 and installed the engine into one of his boats. And so was the end of a car given to me by someone whom I considered a very special man.
Related CC reading:
Curbside Classic: 1973 Chevrolet Impala Sport Coupe – The Minnato Connection
Heart warming story. Must have been tough for him to not get forgiveness from his sons but I am glad the car went o someone who loved and appreciated the car (and Cliff).
Chip,
Have you heard of ACA aka ACoA Adult Children of Alcoholics. I am also child of Alcoholics, it helped me some. Not being a Believer, made it harder for me, but I still got a lot out of this 12 step program… Maybe get Cliff’s wife to mention it to his boys, who obviously need it too… It is worthwhile to check out in any case.
Yes. And we actually attended some meetings together. He would ask me how I felt about my own dad and his not doing the 12 steps. I said I loved and forgave him. We were never close, but we still got along.
Cliff always told me that he loved his boys in spite of eveything
Damage done in families can be really hard to fix – or even to get past.
You have to respect a car like this – where the body is so shot that 98% of people would refuse to drive it, but where the mechanical stuff just keeps soldiering on. It seems that the opposite is common now – bodies and interiors hold up really well but brittle systems sign the car’s death warrant as useful transport.
While reading this, my mind drifted back to your “End Stage Beater” article from a few years ago, about a similar-era Buick:
https://www.curbsideclassic.com/curbside-classics-american/curbside-classic-1976-buick-regal-sedan-the-end-stage-beater/
…one of the most memorable CC’s, in my opinion, and I can’t help thinking if that Buick had a similar story to Cliff’s Caprice here.
Chip, that’s a very poignant story about Cliff, his car, and his struggles – thanks for taking the time to share it here.
I did read that article and it reminded me of my 77 Cutlass Supreme Brougham sedan. It was not a beater but was a really dependable car.
Cliff told me that he sold Chevy’s new in 1973-1976. He said the bodies were junk but the drivetrains would last. I do remember doing a long burnout in that Caprice just before I sold it. Sad that the body left.
Lovely, a nice story for this time of year. Thank you for recognizing Cliff’s humanity and providing him some dignity at the end of his redeemed life. It’s something we need more of in our current times.
Bittersweet story. Addiction is brutal and the impact on families, especially kids, can scar deeply.
Nice to know that the Caprice was at least an organ donor.
Your acceptance and his family’s lack of forgiveness illustrates a sometimes-sad fact of life:
We select our friends. We do not select our relatives.
I am honestly not good at forgiveness if I think the other person’s misconduct was serious. I don’t know if I could forgive Cliff if I were in his ex-wife’s or sons’ place.
Thank you Chip for sharing.
In the big picture, we are all on our own journeys. And when those journeys intersect however they do, if they can generate some goodness, that’s a win. At least that’s how I look at things.
It sounds as if Cliff benefited from his time with you, and you benefited from your time with him. Plus, the car.
Hopefully Cliff’s family will ultimately find their peace.
Chip, this was a very moving story – thank you!
From outside it seems obvious that Cliff’s sons should have forgiven him … yet, at times I really wrestle with trying to forgive others. I suspect I wouldn’t have done any better than Cliff’s sons were I in their place.
Thank you for your kindness to him.
Thanks for sharing this story; and for being a decent human being. I salute you
A moving story, and very well-written.
My mother became an alcoholic when my father died of cancer. Took a long time to forgive her for the way she was but in the end, in a lot of ways too late since she died a year later, I realized it was because she missed and loved my father every day of her life until she died and just didn’t know how to handle it, she always did everything she could for me, worked two jobs to give me things she knew I wanted and ti keep us in apartments. It’s a long story that left me wishing I was a better son but I also think about how our family was a car family. Dad was a mechanical engineer for GM who I also ended up working for, then he owned shop/gas stations along Rt from Boston up through Saugus, MA. He was “Arco Al, Your cars pal”. Bought Mt mom a new Cadillac in 70 when I was born, over the years he owned a K5 Blazer, Skylark convertible that I remember, a Jeep Cherokee Chief I don’t remember and my mom over the years owned some neat cars. A 64 Tempest, 70 something Gremlin with AMCs V8, a VW Bus/Camper, 73 Plymouth Satellite, big ol Ford LTD wagon that had the parking pin problem and
crashed itself into a tree one night. Later in life she bought herself a huge Chevy 2500 lonh bed extend cab to tow her camper, was funny seeing her drive the thing she was so small. She told me about the old Model A Ford she learned to drive on and the shift pattern that she had such a problem with. Mom was a driver. Alcohol and cancer, the guy had the worst of what this world has to offer and it sounds like he held it together. In the end my mom stopped drinking and died of a brain bleed not knowing where she was or when it was. I wonder how I would do.
This is a heartbreaking story, but not uncommon . My mom started smoking after she found a pack of cigarettes in his suit which was odd since my dad had gone through lymphoid cancer.
Mom died of a broken heart.
One thing I’ve noticed about not drinking was the quality of my tires increased a lot. If you look at tires in a bar parking lot you will see a lot of thin all season tires. One night out is at least one new tire. Lol.
Another good if heart rending read .
Forgiveness isn’t easy to give to those who are quite deliberate about their meanness and hate .
Funny about the water pooling in the sun visors thing, I’ve discovered it when looking at old vehicles .
Cliff was lucky to have you as a friend .
-Nate
Thank you for all the kind words. Cliff was remarkable, peace loving man. He really wanted to do right by those he’d hurt so badly.
I remember sitting in the room he was renting. We both cried together knowing that his time was drawing closer. His landlord had asked me to help get him into the Hospice care wing of the hospital.
We were successful in accomplishing that and he lived two weeks in comfort.
I was also able to help his ex wife reconnect with him and spend time with him before his passing.
I won’t get religious, but I know that God brought us together even for a time. I was honored to help this man who’d served our country and just wanted to understand how his boys might be feeling.
I was lucky to have had such a dear friend. We gave his middle name – Lyn – to our son.
A really great story, I needed that, in such an unsure worldits good to read such a heartfelt story, thank you for sharing, it really hit home for myself