Image from Drive.com
So Long Jaaag
Our 2004 Jaguar XJ8 was starting to exhibit its true nature and began breaking down with increasing frequency. Despite several “Ford” stampings on parts, the costs were decidedly Jaguar. So I decided to engage in one of my favorite pass-times; negotiating the price on another car.
The Jag was a wonderful ride, not as roomy as its size would suggest, though. Forgive the picture quality; iPhone 3GS & nighttime.
We had decided I should focus my efforts on a 2009 VW CC, a car which I thought was a modern interpretation of the 1953 Studebaker Coupes, but joking called a cockroach or…worse…a limp dick.
Setting up A Deal
I enjoyed calling up various VW dealers across the Houston metro area, asking them to competitively bid on the price for one on an ultra low milage lease, in Mocha Brown Metallic with a Cornsilk interior. My partner worked from home and I took the bus to work, we barely drove except to the liquor store, clubs and the grocery store – in that order. I was in my 20’s, what do you expect?
Some dealers would play ball, but many refused outright to talk anything about deals over the phone. That was fine with me, that told me they would be a nightmare to deal with in person.
Side note; in 2025 this is still an issue. My most recent car purchase was narrowed down to 2 dealers out of 10, in a 600 mile radius because 8 of them wouldn’t deal with me over the phone or over email. Dealers, get it together.
Back to the story at hand. I narrowed it down to 3 VW dealers within an hour’s driving distance. The winner was a dealer in Southwest Houston – by a mere $39. It was set; I would be in at 8:45 pm that evening to sign the paperwork and pick up the car. I specifically chose 15 minutes to their closing time because I wanted everyone eager to go home and less willing to hang around trying to upsell me on bull.
I came home and told my partner
“Clear out the Jag, it’s getting traded in, I got us a VW CC!”
“Wait, what?”
I don’t like to dawdle on decisions. Just make one and move on.
We arrived at the dealer, they appraised the car & signed the paperwork. We were out within 15 minutes and honestly, I’m not sure how I pulled that off, but it happened. I still follow this method for purchasing cars today, probably why I enjoy car shopping more than most.
A Hooker, A Conversion Van & A Ditch
We’d had the car for about 3 months when a hooker and a conversion van stepped in to punch me right in the nuts.
I was in the garage, refinishing my kitchen cabinets one early afternoon. Shiner Bock in one hand, paintbrush in the other. It was a rare time of year, in Houston, when you could spend a good time outdoors. It usually lasts 2 weeks. Our practically new VW was parked in a driveway of an empty lot next door.
I looked out of my garage door, Lady Gaga playing on my radio, when I saw someone go walking by. That wasn’t common in our neighborhood. We didn’t live in the kind of place where people meandered.
Was it the lack of sidewalks? Maybe.
The lack of amenities? Possibly.
Or the fact that we lived in the 6th most dangerous hood in the entire country and the sounds of gunshots was so common HPD wouldn’t respond to them? That. That’s why.
Sunnyside was considered the Black Wall St. of Houston in the 1940’s-1950’s. By 2009 it was a decimated shell.
The rare pedestrian sauntered up to me, in my garage, and asked, all sugar and spice “Need some help there, honey?” That’s when I finally realized she was a hooker.
I quickly said “No, thank you, ma’am.” She, her cutoffs and tube top were on her way.
It couldn’t have been more than halfway into the next track on The Fame Monster when I heard the unmistakable sound of a worn out GM V8 accelerate. You know it, a ticking, flapping kind of noise. I looked up just in time to see a GMC Vandura swerve, slam into the side of our VW CC and toss it right into a ditch.
WTF Now?
If I hadn’t watched it happen I wouldn’t have believed it.
Throwing open the door to the house I shouted for my partner to call 9-1-1.
I ran over to the van to check on the driver when a very old gentleman wriggled his way out and said “My cane got stuck on the accelerator.” I asked, with my beer still in hand, if he was ok and it seemed like he was. It didn’t take long for services to arrive and for both of our cars to be towed away.
A man. His van. The offending cane. Also pictured: our white 1994 XJS and our 1989 black Cadillac Allante that we called Bestia Nera. It lived up to that name.
Little did I know that we wouldn’t see that VW again for 5 months.
First there was the arguing with insurance about getting it out of the tow yard. Eventually the insurance company had to send someone out with over a grand in cash. I felt bad for the man they sent, even he said out of all of the yards he’d been to it was a dicey situation. Ah the joys of living in the ‘hood.
Then insurance couldn’t decide whether the car was totaled or not. Initial estimates of repairs was a laughable $4,000.
No words
As the months went on they kept finding more and more damage.
- Bent unibody frame
- 2 door skins
- 1 front fender
- 1 rear quarter panel
- 2 headlights
- 1 steering rack
Parts were exceptionally delayed because the car was so new and they kept trying to straighten out how bent it was. We lost count how many times they had to drop the engine because they found something else. They also identified that the car was assembled without the internals of one of the brake lights. Each time the dealer called we just said “WTF now?”
Eventually the bill came to over $16,000, and they still wouldn’t total the car. It was too new.
Just, no words
Just Done
Shortly we got the car back, my partner & I called it quits. Things had been bad for a while. A friend ended his life. I lost my job and got a new one, that prevented me from using transit. So we had to get yet another car as the commute would have obliterated the lease miles(see my article on my 300D). The Allante went to literal pieces and frankly we just couldn’t stand each other anymore. My partner and I, not the cars…though the cars too I guess. It happens.
I have no idea how it was after it was repairs, but he says it bucked and jerked in parking lots to the point of car sickness. Apparently the dealer was at a loss as to what to do with it, once it was turned in. The severity of the damage made it unsellable.
But that’s his tale to tell – by that time I was living across the country and starting a new life.
Well, at least you got out of that Houston neighborhood.
RRJ:
And back to the U.S.!
How far along did they find the bent unibody frame? I’d think that would make totaling it a no-brainer, but then I’m not an insurance adjuster.
Had me at hooker soliciting door to door!
Tow yards are never fun to deal with.
Well, that’s an, ah, interesting story. haha
Anyhow. Back in 1998 I leased my first brand new Cadillac. It was the fresh out Catera. I liked that it was smaller and kind of sporty (for that time). I wanted the black with tan leather or black with black leather, but they couldn’t find one. Actually, I wanted the cloth (quite unique), but they said one couldn’t be found in the entire USA. So I ended up with a “sage” (silverish tan) with tan leather. Not my first choice, but ok. At two months into the lease, I rear ended someone due to the sun in my eyes and I hit that car going at least 30 MPH after slowing down a little. It totaled her car and my new Catera had extensive damage. Since not all Cadillac dealers could sell them, I had to buy it from a dealer over an hour away and that’s where the car had to go for repairs. Being a lease, I just wanted it to be totaled and move on. Nope. The insurance said the estimate didn’t hit a high enough value to brand it as a loss. So fix it they would.
What happened next was anything but good. The dealer told me up front that the parts would take a long time to get. Ok, I had my wife’s car that we could share. However, after a week the dealer told me the parts were on back order and could be a month or more to get. So I picked up a highly used but very clean/well running 1992 Lincoln Continental. Even with over 100K, I actually liked that car better than the Catera. About 5 months into the ordeal, they called me to say the final part arrived and the car would be ready the next day. However, what they didn’t know until they had the entire car back together was that the accident caused the timing belt to jump and the entire engine was trash. It wasn’t till they started (tried to) the car that they realized this. Ok, I got the call and was told not to come up as the car needed a new engine. Had we known this up front, the car would have been deemed a total loss. Too late now! So another month goes by between the insurance and getting the engine. So nearly 7 months in total, I got the Catera back and sold the Lincoln to my brother-in-law for the same price I paid for it. He loved that car and drove it for many more years. Me? Thankfully the Catera ran and drove like new, but as soon as that lease was up, it was gone.
Stories like this fascinate me. Thanks for sharing this slice of your life.
I like the comparison of the CC to the ’53 Stude coupe. I’m not a fan of these and the Mercedes 4-door coupes as I cringe at the thought of having to fold my tall and increasingly creaky body into one.
When an insurance company drags out a typical everyday car accident claim with no apparent injuries from what should be a couple of weeks to FIVE MONTHS something is going to give. No matter how stable a structure appears that kind of stress will find any fissures and stress them to pieces. Your comment “Several (Ford) stampings on parts, the costs were decidedly Jaguar” is so true. As a previous owner of a 08 Volvo C30 T5, every other part seemed to be stamped FoMoCo with many parts interchangeable with the Ford Focus or Mazda 3 hatchback yet priced at two to three times as much.
You mentioned one of your favorite pass-times is negotiating the purchase price on cars. Please let us know in your next COAL what you enjoy about negotiating price that most buyers despise.