Ever wonder what Richard Petty’s NASCAR ride would have looked like had he driven for Citroen rather than Plymouth? Didn’t think so. But being an aficionado of things Citroen, especially 2CVs, a question such as this is something that I just can’t ignore. So being a designer, my solution is either to pull out the sketch pad or sit down at my Mac and visualize my fantasy. One adage that I have found that applies to both cars and women is “Fantasy is Better Than Reality”. Don’t cost nuthin to sketch up a fantasy car, and you don’t have to worry about your one night’s stand actually having needs or excessive flatulence. Perfect world in my book.
Growing up in the ‘50s, and an ardent fan of Car Craft and Rod & Custom magazines, I couldn’t get enough of Joe Bailon’s (credited with inventing Candy Apple Red paint) ’52 Chevy customs. After the Miata was introduced in 1990, it naturally occurred to me, but absolutely no one else in the world, what Bailon would have done with the Miata. Buick portholes and chrome sweepspear; continental kit; Olds Fiesta spinners; and curb feelers. I felt very pleased with the result in my own little world.
Much closer to earth was this 1948 Ford short-tracker, something you might have seen at the Danbury State Fair. The last of the fat-bodied Fords.
This isn’t fantasy. It was the paint scheme that I created for Ed Mautner’s car in 1984. The perceptive amongst you will realize that this is a direct ripoff of Dale Earnhardt’s Wrangler paint scheme. Worked well for the Rabbit too. I ain’t proud.
A friend of mine ran an independent Volvo repair shop and built himself a GT Pinto. Stop sniggering, these things were fast. With minimal modifications, these cars were faster than Showroom Stock Corvettes, and many of the GT 1 cars. They really pissed off the Porsche 911 crowd. The GT Pintos ran in the same race as the GT 1 cars, but started a half a lap back. It didn’t take long before the top Pintos were picking off the slower Porsches. Why? The GT Pinto class didn’t allow many modifications—almost no adjustability. The GT 1 cars were allowed tons of adjustability. Since many of the GT 1 owners didn’t have budgets for testing, they generally wrenched in the wrong direction.
So remember, Fantasy is Better Than Reality.
All illustrations by the author in Adobe Illustrator.
Count another in the “don’t laugh at a racing Pinto” fraternity. I still remember running B-Sedan autocross in Erie back in the early/mid-70’s. If you couldn’t afford a BMW 1600 or 2002 (which were the class killers) the next best thing was a 2.0 liter Pinto with about $300 spent on the suspension and tyres. Those little bastards could run, and with the suspension modifications were usually capable of giving the typical SCCA-American-Cars-Suck purists heartburn.
Brilliant! I didn’t even recognize the Miata at first and I drive one! How do I get my hardtop like that… And the 2CV. What fun.
There should be a decimal point in front of that 43.
I love 2CV racing, which still occurs in the UK. I don’t think shrinking the windshield would help much though.
My favorite racing Pinto was the product of Car and Driver’s reader beater campaign. It really pains me to read their current drivel when I think of the time that they employed smart engineers that could turn a Pinto and a Vega into winning race cars, not to mention their involvement in the first successful Mazda on American tracks. Now they’re just another appendage of Detroit.
This is a hoot. Before reading the caption, I saw King Richard’s 2CV and thought it was an Anglia set up for drag racing.
All photos are grey blank squares for me (???)
All coming through fine for me, both on home and office computers.
I had that happen on my Kindle, but it was fine on the PC. Not sure what the deal was.
You must be temporarily colorblind or your browser is having an error.
Nice job, Kevin. Have you ever thought of de-Broughaming some of the worst offenders of the ’70s? It would be interesting to see a Cordoba, Cutlass Supreme coupe or Fleetwood trimmed out like a Ford Custom 300, with a steel top, dog dish hubcaps, and minimal chrome trim.
Tom,
That’s an interesting idea. My post malaise/brougham era ’79 Caprice was a nice driver once I installed Koni shocks, monster Quickor sway bars, and a 13″ leather Momo steering wheel. Thanks for the inspiration.