Alert readers may notice that the above photo is not, in fact, a 1984 Plymouth Reliant wagon. I confess that I’m fully aware of the difference between a Ferrari 365 GTB4 and a Chrysler K-Car. Granted this admission, I realize that it leaves me open to accusations of posting shameless clickbait, but hear me out: in fact, there is a tie-in, inconceivable as it may seem. We will arrive at it, shortly.
The last installment of my COAL saga ended as our little Toyota Starlet (dubbed “the ****box” by a decidedly non-woke Chevy salesman) ascended to automotive Valhalla after a mauvais quart d’heure on Westminster Way in the verdant northern suburbs of Greater Seattle, hereafter fondly referred to as Tapioca Beach in homage to Henry Manney’s (of R&T fame) homeland. The Starlet’s unfortunate demise left an empty stable chez nous (okay, that’s enough French), which presented me with the unwelcome task of locating a replacement on fairly short notice.
In our previous episode I also referred to my new employment at the Bertone of North Seattle, an auto restoration shop, run by a semi-legendary acquaintance who had abandoned his previous employment as sheet metal whisperer extraordinaire in Southern California because of its unbearable traffic and rising taxes, or so the story goes. His reputation seems to have preceded him, the result being that any enthusiast living in Western Washington who owned a dented vehicle deemed to be somewhere on the exotic car scale made a beeline to his new operation to take advantage of his particular gifts. As he didn’t have time to do everything himself, he added a disparate cast of characters to assist, including a very unskilled yours truly.
Why would he hire me? In a word, I was cheap and I could speak fluent car geek lingo, which may have temporarily distracted him from my lack of experience in the actual fundamentals of automobile restoration. I was a quick learner, however, and soon was handling a variety of tasks, from primer to basic paint, including my speciality, wet sanding for hours on end and then bringing out the highlights of a high-priced finish with my buffing wheel. I learned the trade on objects of lesser value, homely VW Beetle convertibles and scores of stolid Volvos and eventually graduated to BMW’s, Porsches and the occasional Jaguar or Rolls.
Then came the day when a Ferrari 365 GTB4, more commonly known as a Daytona, rolled into our shop. We all stood in silence as our 6’4″ boss slowly unfolded himself from the driver’s seat and briefed us on our mission for the coming weeks: we were to color change the rolling automotive icon from Nero (black) to (of course) Rosso Corsa, Ferrari racing red. This news resulted in a gnashing of teeth with accompanying wailing as there is nothing more laborious, time consuming, and all-around vexing than performing a color swap. This goes for any car, but add to that the pressure of effecting the change on a Ferrari, and not just any Ferrari, but a plexi-nose, Euro-spec Daytona, that had (reputedly) belonged to Gina Lollobrigida. Also, the job was undertaken at the behest of the local authorized Ferrari concessionaire, not some rich rube who wouldn’t notice overspray in his trunk and paint runs in his door jambs.
The pressure was on, and it ratcheted up noticeably as the days went by.
All this drama took place as I was confronted with the chore of replacing the family car. Frankly, with all the pressure we were under at work, I couldn’t have cared less what I came up with as long as it ran and didn’t use up too much fuel in the process. My boss offered to let me tag along to an auto auction, where I was determined to find a late model Volvo 245 with four wheels and no lit warning lights, but none was forthcoming. That left the old reliable method, checking the weekend dealer ads in the Seattle Times. I believe my credentials as a cheapskate were firmly established in our previous installments, so it will come as no surprise that price out the door was the chief consideration in the ensuing process. I realized that given the needs of my family a station wagon would be in order, the cheaper, the better. The newfangled minivan had recently been introduced in the form of the Chrysler/Dodge/Plymouth triumvirate, but seemed pricey, especially given that they were currently the hottest thing since sliced bread with pricing above list still being the norm. On the other hand, the minivan was essentially just a modified K-Car platform, so why not go to the source itself?
A Chrysler built compact wagon seemed like a reasonable if uninspired choice. Even though the K-Car”s arrival was unheralded in comparison to the trumpet fanfare that announced the GM X-Cars, they seemed to be better engineered, even if somewhat dowdy in appearance, their chief stylistic attribute being a valiant (no pun intended) attempt to draw each and every line with a straight edge. Chrysler Corporation would ride Lee Iacocca’s fetish for upright and formal styling nearly to its grave, but in the case of the wagon version of the K-Car, its box-like attributes resulted in a practical workhorse with loads of space. It couldn’t match the expanded cube on wheels that was the original Caravan and Voyager, but it was also less pricey, and in those early days of Minivan Mania, much more accessible.
A test drive revealed that the generic K-Car also failed to exhibit the vices of the comparable X-Car. It’s handling characteristics didn’t frighten the little children, not to mention its driver. The interior, while obviously not fooling anyone with its bountiful fake wood and plastic chrome, nevertheless seemed like it might last longer than the third world polymers of the X-Cars. The 96 horsepower, 2.2 liter SOHC four was a thousand cc’s up on the Starlet and actually had some zip, at least when paired with the admittedly rare four-speed manual transmission. Don’t ask me how, but somehow I managed to find one of those, in a Plymouth Reliant Wagon, no less. The details are murky–of all the cars I’ve acquired, the purchase of the Reliant remains the least memorable. The dealer was in downtown Seattle, but I don’t recall its name or location. Once again it was a Saturday ad special, no doubt a loss-leader that the dealer was happy to be rid of as who buys an American family station wagon with a manual transmission?
Details of the trim designation recede into history, but our Plymouth had to exist at the very bottom of the K-Car pecking order. Its single option was a dealer-installed rear window defroster that lasted maybe a total of two years before peeling off strip by strip. Otherwise, vinyl upholstery and an AM radio were the order of the day. The front seat was a bench affair with a folding arm rest in the middle and a manual shifter threatening any passenger foolish enough to sit in center position. However, even our base model had all that fake wood, which actually wasn’t the least authentic representative of the genre ever produced. The accompanying photos are of a higher trim package, but the colors are identical to our base model’s less cushy features. Also, as mentioned, no fancy stereo tape deck or air-conditioning graced our K-Car (who needs air-conditioning in Seattle?). Still, the interior was two or three cuts above the ill-starred Citation I had contemplated buying only a few years previously.
Long story short, my problem was solved. Our family again was graced with reliable transportation, so I could turn my attention to the other problem at hand, one Ferrari Daytona, which was coming apart piece by piece, screw by screw, as we airbrushed its darkness into light, or at least Rosso Corsa. Now on a lesser car a multitude of sins could be covered with masking tape: for instance, weatherstripping could be left in place as who would care to peel it aside in search of an original color on your Dodge Dart? Our benevolent boss banned any masking tape in proximity to the Ferrari. Everything had to be disassembled, carefully marked, and put away for safe keeping. The doors came off, all the weatherproofing rubber came off, the trunk lid, hood, and fenders were removed. The labor was intensive, but we took the responsibility very seriously as we could feel the eyes of history upon us.
In the process of taking the Daytona apart a few things were revealed. First, it became apparent that perhaps we were taking more care than the original factory hands had managed. As we dug beneath the surface we came to realize that not every Ferrari employee was a virtuoso craftsman, turning wrenches or wielding an arc-welder to Vivaldi accompaniment while wearing spotless white gloves and pressed coveralls. For example, some of the chassis welds seemed downright suspect, as did some of the wire routing and plumbing details under the hood. We were grateful we didn’t have to paint the engine bay as we would never have got everything back together given the chaos that sometimes reigned.
Don’t get me wrong…nothing in there was an actual safety hazard or necessarily under-engineered, but after all we aren’t talking about some vast industrial operation with unlimited resources set down by angels in the midst of the Modena suburbs. Given that fact, the quality of workmanship could be described in places as hit or miss depending, perhaps, on whether it occurred before or after the requisite two hour Italian lunch complete with wine. Nevertheless, that had no bearing on our task. When the Daytona had been built the factory in Maranello was simply cranking out the latest production model while no doubt distracted by what was being put together for Niki over in the racing department. Be that as it may, even by the mid 80’s it had become apparent that the Daytona might be the last of the great front-engined V-12, true sports two-seaters; it was already considered a classic. Of course, we didn’t know that in another few decades Daytona coupes would bring in the neighborhood of half a million dollars or more, while the spiders would go over a million. All the same, we very much realized that we were working on the automotive holy grail.
The labor went on for weeks, then months. I took photos of the process, and then lost them, along with my Dan Gurney autographed issue of R&T with his Eagle Westlake on the cover and my Phil Hill signed program from the historic races at Kent (all is vanity, the preacher says). In due time, we did complete the project–the Daytona emerged from the paint booth resplendent in red after several bouts of wet-sanding with 600 grit between coats. Even the door jambs and the inside of the hood and trunk lid shone. She was a thing of beauty and a joy forever, and after a trip to the detailers, the Daytona was ready to be delivered back to the Ferrari agents on Capitol Hill. Who would be selected for the honors? As it happened, they fell to me.
Now it is distinctly possible that no one else wanted to take the risk, but I was young and foolish enough to think that I’d won some kind of lottery. Upon reflection, though, it occurred to me that unless I wanted to brave Aurora Avenue and downtown Seattle, the only practicable route to Ferrari Central was via I-5, which even in the best of times was something akin to a war zone. Repressing the reality that I was about to drive a car in rush hour traffic that was presently worth more than my annual household income, I scrubbed my hands, ran my hand through my hair and blew off the day’s bondo dust with an airhose. Satisfied that I was presentable, I fired up the four cam V-12 and headed for the nearest freeway on-ramp.
Some notion of the concept of celebrity status immediately dawned on me. Everyone on the road wanted to take a gander at the low-slung, very red car, which meant that they wanted to get as close as possible. Cars were soon following close to my rear bumper while drivers in front of me touched their brakes to take a closer look in the rear view mirror. Even the unlikeliest Detroit Brougham-mobiles slowed to check out out all that Daytona bling. Somewhere along the way I remembered a story the boss had related about the time he’d taken a freshly painted 275 GTB out for a spin (‘to dry the paint’) and immediately crashed it. He ended up having to buy it. Assorted Italian exclamations came to mind in that moment, none of them printable.
Somehow, sweat running down my face, I made it downtown, found the right exit and managed to navigate the steep hills leading up to the Ferrari dealership without destroying the clutch. I brought her home with a sense of both relief and regret as I entered a welcoming garage with all hands lined up to watch as I pulled in. I blipped the throttle a few times for good measure and pulled myself up out of that elegant leather lined cockpit, realizing that I was shaking. The Ferrari techs gathered around to take a look while someone, possibly the Commendatore of Capitol Hill, came to inspect our work. No complaints were forthcoming…
More Ferraris would grace our shop in days to come, but none had the stature or impact of that 365 GTB4. My next favorite would be a 246 Dino that belonged to a private customer, so no extended delivery drives were forthcoming. I did take it around the block a few times, and occasionally I would sneak away from my assigned labors just to sit in it. I came to regard the Daytona and Dino as my Ferraris…but it dawned on me somewhere along the line that the odds of my ever owning one were nil, and ultimately realized that was fine as the stresses involved in Ferrari ownership seemed to be a very high price to pay. I’m speaking not only of the financial burden, but the emotional toll wrought by worrying every moment it was out of the garage that some idiot was going to run into it. There’s an old account from a Lusso owner who claimed that he died whenever a fly came close to his car, once when it landed, and once when he checked for the dent it had made. In the end that’s no way to live…
Returning to the subject of the Reliant wagon (remember the Reliant wagon?) seems a bit anti-climatic. Nevertheless, I must finish up our story. We drove the little K-Car into the ’90’s and it served its purpose. No excitement was involved, except maybe for the time it blew a head gasket after it had passed the 100,000 mile milestone. I had replaced the timing belt myself some time around the 75,000 mile mark, a task probably above my pay grade, but successfully accomplished with the aid of a Haynes manual. The Plymouth also seemed to attract bumps in the night–as I recall it was in the shop three times for accident damage, none of them my fault. All involved mostly sheet metal, so no great harm was done. At some point it was joined in the Tapioca Beach stable by a late ’70’s Corolla, the anti-Starlet/anti-Christ, but that’s an account for another time. By the time we said goodby to the Reliant, it was pretty shopworn, as any vehicle would be whose chief purpose was hauling kids from pillar to post. It evokes no strong memories, neither good nor bad–it was simply transportation, and I won’t begrudge it for that. Not every car has to elicit strong emotions; I had all the exotica down at the shop for that. In the end it did its job, and that was enough. It was traded in for something larger, and much less reliable as it turns out, but that account will wait till next week. For now, behold, the sun rises above the horizon and I must cease my tale.
Just think – you could be the only person in the world who could weave a tale from your intimate and concurrent relationships with a Ferrari 365 and a Reliant wagon. Bravo!
For someone with as much Mopar-love as I possess, I wonder how I never got the first bit of K car experience. I always found those early wagons appealing, whether a plain Plymouth like yours or the wood-festooned Chrysler version with the leather inside. And I love the idea of the stick shift in one of these.
And, if I may be permitted to engage in the heretical, I liked the Ferrari better in black.
Totally agree.
Red Ferraris are all over the place (I was going to say “a dime a dozen” but then realized the absurdity of applying that cliché to Ferraris). As with a number of cars, the sensuous curves of the 365 GTB4 are better highlighted in black.
I’m with you guys too. I prefer it in black as well.
Fine job on the extensive repaint however.
Glad someone appreciates all the work we did on the repaint! Wish I’d copied down the VIN so I could find out what happened to the Daytona in the ensuing years.
But the black would show every dent from each time a fly landed on it…
Thanks JP! The manual worked just fine…I never felt I was driving a penalty box. It would be interesting to know what the stats are for the manual. Surely below 10 percent?
A black Ferrari? But, but…tradition!!!
Reliant Wagon
One of my favorite Paul Newman movies is the 1981 “Absence of Malice”. An understated legal drama that co-starred Sally Field and Melinda Dillon (two of my favorite actresses from those days).
(Did I ever tell you I got a ticket at he Burbank Warner Bros studio for parking my Avis Town Car in Sally Fields’s personal parking spot?). Short story – just told. There was a sign but it was kinda low and I couldn’t see it over the Lincoln’s long hood.
Anyway, in the movie Paul had an antique motor yacht and a yellow 1981 Plymouth Reliant station wagon. That car was in a lot of the movie’s shots and IMO made Newman look even more like the practical and very very smart individual that he actually portrayed in the film.
If I had owned a car in those Manhattan cliff dwelling years I would have sought out a Reliant wagon.
In yellow.
Like Paul’s
“… the stresses involved in Ferrari ownership seemed to be a very high price to pay.”
Any high maintenance part of life, a yacht, multiple mansions, speedy aircraft ownership, and even some spouses, can cause one to look for a simpler, saner way to live life. Admittedly, I have never owned a yacht, mansions, or a speedy aircraft, but it does seem to be an obvious truth to even the most casual observer. Yea, there was that one spouse, but she switched spouses, so all is well.
Your job experience certainly made that point clear and probably saved you years of anxiety. And it’s clear you realize and appreciate that. That’s a valuable piece of knowledge.
Gina Lollobrigida
I just looked her up; born in 1927 and she’s still on this earth. That’s really cool to hear.
(Sally and Paul in his Reliant)
Gina Lolllobrigida is not only alive at age 95 – as recently as last month she ran for a seat in the Italian Senate. Unfortunately, she did not win the election.
Silly side note: I have memories of her name being parodied twice on The Flintstones as “Lollobrickida,” a maid whose Italian cooking is loved by Fred, and as “Gina Loadabricks,” a high school classmate of Fred’s. Not many are still alive who have had this same honor; Ann Margaret (“Ann Margrock”) and the Beau Brummells (the “Beau Brumrocks,” three of whom are still with us) are the only others that immediately come to mind.
I also think I remember a Warner Brothers cartoon where a gondola in Venice went under span marked “Lowla Bridgida” or something like that.
Oh my goodness…I certainly missed that in Venice when I lived there, but I was walking, not taking a gondola!
I remember those Flintstones episodes but I think that your off on the Beau Brummell reference. “The Beau Brummelstones” combined the names of the Beau Brummell and The Rolling Stones.
😂
You’re right, HBEAN! I guess it’s been too many years since I’ve watched an episode of that show.
Combining the Beau Brummells’ and The Rolling Stones’ names was an odd move on Hanna Barbara’s part, since the BBs were an American (San Francisco) response to the popularity of the British Invasion groups of that time. Or maybe it wasn’t so odd, after all, in the alternate universe of Bedrock…
We’ve progressed from a Reliant to a Ferrari to the Flintstones? Inconceivable!
Viva Gina!! And I’m astounded by the Flintstone reference…
Whew! I almost didn’t post that, out of concern that it might’ve been too far off topic.
But if I’ve learned one thing in the 10 or so years I’ve been coming to this site, it’s that many of my fellow CC commenters are as fascinated by trivia as I am. And most of us love to learn new things.
Great, great story about Paul Newman…the movie Reliant was the same color as mine, too! I’ll have to see if I can find a place to stream Absence of Malice. I’m sure I’ve seen it, but have no recollection of movie or car. Good story about parking in Sally Field’s spot, too.
My time served at the Auto Resto place did cure me of my Italian exotica fever. I still love to look at the old ones— and some of the new ones, but they seem to lack something—probably the V12 hooked to a manual gearbox. And yes, any of those high maintenance items are best left to the Uber wealthy. They will break us mere mortals in more ways than one.
Part of the reason the Aries and Reliant had such a lasting low buck and utilitarian identity, is because nearly all of them were sold, with the most bland and basic steel wheel styles. And very serious, flat-faced wheel cover designs. I understand, they needed to ensure the ‘super’ K-Cars (Lebaron/400/E-Class/600), had to look pricier and more expensive. But the basic K-cars really needed more cheerful, and sportier, wheel/wheel cover choices. Besides more performance, and handling options.
Chrysler, must have been genuinely fearful about Reliant/Aries sales cannibalizing the luxury K-Cars. Without ensuring enough distinction, from the cheaper cars.
The rather attractive and bright steel wheel design on the left, was only offered in 1981. Perhaps dropped, to cut costs, but it was one of the best K wheel styles of its entire production run, IMO. The dishwater dull wheels on the right, more reflective of the austere and too serious design, almost all wheels/wheel covers had.
I don’t love the brown on this Reliant Turbo, but the beefier tires and Pumper wheels from the Dodge Daytona, vastly improve the looks of this Plymouth wagon. More presence, and character, than 99.99% of the flock of timid Ks.
I do like the look of those wheels, but I suspect some would say that it looks like grandma wearing leopard-skin boots…
Good call on the lack of attractive wheels for the downmarket K-cars. When Iacocca took over, “Extra Care in Engineering” gave way to “Extra Care in Selling Cars”. Lido was no fool, and there’s no doubt in my mind that Chrysler’s really bad habit of shooting themselves in the foot when it came to marketing did not escape him. Here was the ‘make a Mustang out of a Falcon’ guy so stuff like selling way more, lower-profit Valiant Dusters than the much more lucrative E- and B-body coupes just was not going to happen on his watch.
So, yeah, Reliants and Aries’ were going to look as proletariat as possible to make the upscale Lebaron and 400/600 more appealing and worth the extra coin. Magnum 500 wheels were never an option on a Falcon. The closest that ever came over at Ford were those funky, fake chrome reverse wheelcovers you could get on a ’65 Comet Cyclone.
It’s also been stated before that the initial run of K’s that hit dealerships in ’81 were mostly highly optioned cars, which may have slowed sales, as the advertised MSRP was hard to find in reality. My first impression of the new K cars was based on a well-optioned Reliant SE 2-door that my father’s dealer buddy gave him as a loaner when one or another of our family cars was in for service. It had those ’81 only wheels with the fancier center caps and trim rings, 2-tone paint, velour interior with center armrest, A/C, cruise, stereo cassette, the light group that included a map light and some other ancillary convenience lights, etc. Aries and Reliant K’s equipped that way were in a very small minority as time went on, but the ’81’s could be had with vinyl roof treatments and quite a upgrades that were seldom represented in the broader sense.
I’m trying to remember when aluminum wheels took over from the old steel wheels with hubcaps. It’s getting hard to find a car with the latter anymore.
Those wheels were on ‘82 models also, they were the 14” upgrade. Our wagon had them. Hmmm, yellow, 4 speed, ours DID have the woodgrain sides. Very embarrassing family car by the time we got rid of it around 1990, when I was in HS.
My ‘84 had pretty attractive full wheel covers. Probably not as practical for brake cooling as those ‘81 steel wheels, but I liked the way they looked. I would have hated to have been in Chrysler marketing when they had that wide range of K-based cars that all looked alike…
You probably bought the car from S.L. Savidge, who had a Chrysler-Plymouth-Dodge dealership in Downtown Seattle for many years.
Thanks Eric! That photo does ring a bell…
I do look forward to Wednesday mornings…even with a K-car.
I had a Reliant as a company long-term rental for about 3 or 4 months in 1985. Given that my daily commute took me over winding Coldwater Canyon in LA in the morning, I would undoubtedly have enjoyed it more with a manual. It droned and buzzed, as it canyon bludgeoned through the tight curves. Oh well.
It got replaced by a brand new W124 300E, so that was quite the upgrade. How many Reliants were upgraded to a new Mercedes? Maybe by a lottery winner. And (lucky) me.
Thank you, Paul. The gap doom a Reliant to an E-clas is two thirds of the way from a Reliant to a Daytona!
The Reliable Reliant that I owned still holds my record for highest number of miles driven of all the cars I have owned. Per year and lifetime.
I checked out a Reliant wagon at the time of purchase of the sedan we bought, but stayed with the car.
Glad to see you got mostly good Reliable service from yours.
The Reliant was never glamorous, but she was steady! Glad to hear yours was long-lived as well…
Another round of great stories!
…wheredya want I should drop this loada fanfare?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSTE3FVH9X0
That was true back then, but not now.
“That was true back then, but not now.”
Indeed; no part of North America or Canada is a “no-AC-needed” location any more.
In 2021 Vancouver British Columbia seaside mussels cooked in their shells still attached to coastal rocks.
https://www.cnn.com/2021/07/10/weather/heat-sea-life-deaths-trnd-scn/index.html
Must have been quite an aroma.
We just drove through the remains of the Bolt Creek fire in Western Washington this morning. It’s still smoldering despite the recent rains. We never had fires like that in our neck of the woods until six years ago—since then it’s an annual occurrence.
Somehow I missed that edition of the morning paper. Talk about impulse buying!
I definitely thought of the new reality when I wrote that line. Now you need AC just to filter out the smoke from the wild fires in late summer…
Late to the reading here, but I just wanted to say Thanks! Steven for the excellent story.
And also to say that my mother in law had an Aires wagon of about the same vintage as your Reliant…also with the manual transmission. Super rare then, probably no examples still rolling. There couldn’t have been that many of those sold period. I’ve tried to ask her about that car – like how did she even find one with a manual – but she’s 90 now and details like that don’t really interest her.
In your case, I suppose that if one got to drive Ferraris during the day, it was ok to drive a Reliant at home. Oh, and I too feel that the Daytona was diminished by painting it red.
Thank you, Jeff!
Relieved to hear about your MIL’s Aries–I really didn’t have the only K-Car wagon 4-speed…I wish her well as she negotiates her 90’s.
I’m shocked by all this support for black Ferraris. I still have it written in my soul that a true Ferrari must be red for tradition’s sake.
Well, for me at least some of the love for black Ferraris, Daytonas in particular comes from plenty of time spent with Crockett and Tubbs and Crockett’s (fake) Daytona on Friday nights.
This was just so very cool to me in 1984…
Although I may have liked the music for this one even more..
Okay, throw Devo into the mix and I’m on board…
Okay, I get the MV tie-in! I remain a traditionalist, all the same…and I like candy apple red guitars, too!
Don’t hesitate to encourage topic drift, I find it fascinating and always learn something new .
I too think it looks better in black but in So. Cal. black cars are a PIA, I hope to never have one again .
I too like K Cars .
-Nate
Agreed, Nate! Non-sequiturs are some of the most interesting things in life.
After working at the auto restoration shop, I would never own a black car. Never…
I’ve done restorations, I don’t like static display vehicles of any sort so my own tend towards the daily driver (or beater with everything working) side .
I was unable to resist the siren calling of black vehicles until my 1967 MGB GT MKII a decade ago .
I bought it a week before Christmas (prime buying time) when it was 70 degrees out then pressed it into daily driver Yeoman duty plus road rallies, I quickly discovered that not being young & skinny means you can no longer suffer sun nor serious heat…..
Death Valley in Summertime in a non A/C equipped car isn’t real fun .
Of course the too good to pass up deal on a new if twenty year old Motocycle last month, came is glossy black…..
-Nate